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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Emotional_Cellist281 on 2023-09-21 08:07:46.

I (m26) have been dating my girlfriend (25f) for about a year. I have a 4 year old daughter, June, who I’m raising on my own, her mom gave up custody. My girlfriend, Amber, has a brother, john, who I’m not sure if he’s mentally disabled, I figured it’s not my place to ask. John is in his 40s and I honestly thought he was Amber’s dad. From what I understand, he has never moved out, I don’t know where his money comes from, and he hasn’t have a job in maybe 10 years and I know he isn’t dating anyone.

The issue that happened was a few days ago when Amber wanted to go out for some drinks. Like I said, I’m not social, so I really didn’t want to go, but John insisted that he’d watch June. I really wasn’t comfortable with this because I didn’t want to put June in a weird situation, I’ve never left her with anyone other than my parents, but Amber kept saying how great John is with kids and he watched her a lot when they were younger. Reluctantly, I agreed, gave him her overnight bag and the instructions to follow before she goes to bed.

We got an uber later and I came back to find June asleep on the tile floor, in a tight ball and drenched in pee, John was in his room with his door locked. I was furious, but I quickly took her into the bathroom to clean and change her. I asked what happened and he told me when we left, she asked for a soda, became high energy and she overwhelmed him, so he left her alone. I distinctly told him she cannot have soda, but he backtracked and said she had it without asking, which I know is a lie because she cannot open the tabs on her own. When I asked if he knew she peed herself, he said yes and gave her a small spank. I knew I wasn’t going to get far with asking any more questions, so I just grabbed June and left. My girlfriend called and asked why I left and I told her that I don’t’ want her brother near my daughter ever again. She said I’m over reacting and her brother is harmless. We went back and forth and she said if I really keep my daughter from him, he’s going to think he did something wrong and he’ll feel bad and I had it and told her that he did do something wrong and he should feel bad. In way meaner terms, she said I’m being a jerk.

AITA?