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Editor’s Note: when OOP says the word “rapport,” she means “repertoire.”

My Bf Thought My Advice To His Little Cousin About The Industry Was Rude and Discouraging. I Truly Don’t See How I Was!! June 11, 2024

So before I even start I want to say I AM NOT A HATER. I love the arts so much. I wanted to be an actress when I was a kid as well, until I saw what it takes. My father has been in the entertainment industry for 30 years he has been a comedian, producer, television writer, actor anything under the sun my father has done it. As a child, I have helped my father a lot: acting in audition tapes, watching his shows, helping him promote, reading his tv scripts, listening to his comedy bits. Me and my whole family even did an episode on the discovery channel. I have done and seen it all.

My father is now a really great comedian. He’s not world famous but he has some videos that went viral, and appeared on a few tv shows. However, he has shown me what it takes to become an actor. That is to become viral!! Multiple times agents have turned down my dad because he doesn’t have 50,000 to 100,000 followers. It was heartbreaking because my dad had this amazing rapport, but since he is not internet famous he gets cast aside. Don’t get me wrong he makes pretty decent money now, but nowhere near Kevin Heart or Gabriel Iglesias.

Now I saw my bf’s little cousin and she was talking about how she is bouncing around careers. She is thinking about either becoming a musician, actress, or animator. Her cousin went to Juliard and has been on broadway, she is a huge hero for her. I told her honestly as a person whose family has been in the entertainment industry I would say do animation. Nowadays they are looking for people to go viral, and it can be very difficult to become an actress unless you were a child actor. I also explained how people are getting turned down if they don’t have at least 100,000 followers.

To add to this his cousin does not have a rapport. She has done a few musicals for her high school but that is about it. She has not taken acting classes, she has not participated in an acting program, nor does she have an internet following. She is only 16 but I was just trying to show her the reality. Out of all that, I believed animation would be a wonderful segway into the entertainment industry. However, she still wants to try to get into an arts school and build an acting rapport through her university. I said alright you do what’s best I suggest that you try to find an acting program while you’re still this young.

My bf then tells me “Why did you tell her that? That’s not true!”

I was like EXCUSE ME!?? “Um yes they are. That’s LITERALLY why my dad has been turned down from several roles, along with HUNDREDS of other actresses”

He said “No you can go to a University and build connections and become a theater actress that way, being an influencer isn’t acting. That’s not what there looking for.”

I responded “ THATS EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE LOOKING FOR!! They want a fanbase to buy tickets to their movies and shows that’s why they want people with a following.”

After that, I left. I was not about to have him mansplain to me a subject OF WHICH HE HAS NO FUCKEN EXPERIENCE!! I wasn’t trying to be rude to her. I thought I was just trying to give her the best advice. Was I truly discouraging?

Relevant Comments:

jaethegreatone:

My BA is in Speech/Theater. I went to school with people who now have Grammys, Oscars and Emmys. I know others with nominations in them all. I know people who made it to Broadway, know a guy who is a really, really big deal in the Marvel Universe and know a ton of award winning writers.

None of this means anything in terms of return on investment for a degree.

And even if you get all those accolades, you can still be living in a box under the overpass.

But, you can’t convince a young artist the hard facts. You warned her. Now leave it alone. Smile and nod at ever musing of the dream. If you have the time, buy a ticket to her show, post a congratulations. When the inevitable comes, just say I told you so to yourself.

OOP:

I have been trying to explain this. Tell me as a fellow person in the entertainment industry do you believe that there was some truth to what I am saying? And that my partner is being extremely naive?

jaethegreatone:

O I left the industry almost as soon as I began because there is soooooo much truth to what you are saying. I was in acting and music a very long time ago before influencing was a thing. I vividly remember the rumors going around about Puff (before he became Diddy) and to never be alone with him, don’t sign to him, etc. Within the writing world, which I dabble in occasionally now, some publishers want you to have a large following to publish your book.

Then you go through all of this to make pennies on the dollar because pay is not the same. Pennies for millions of music streams. Pennies for millions of views on streaming services. Writing on a show now condensed to a few weeks vs months to the point you don’t even qualify for health insurance because you either don’t work enough or didn’t make it.

She would do better by doing exactly what you said, creating her own platform and going viral. She would at least keep 100% of the profits vs pennies she has to split 5 ways.

Equivalent-One-5499:

Question - what do you think rapport means?

OOP:

It’s like building a name, presence, brand, or gaining experience

Murkami8000:

I think you meant “repertoire” rather than “rapport”?

OOP:

YES THANK YOU THAT WAS THE WORD!!

TheatreWolfeGirl:

NW

I teach theatre to youth. The most difficult is knowing that even IF a kid has that “IT factor” their chances are slim. If that child can dance, sing, play an instrument, then it goes up. Add in them knowing more languages. Being adorable or cute or very pretty.

Bonus points if they are visibly a child of colour.

Extra bonus points if they can actually act!

The industry is tough as nails.

Parents want the best for their kids, and I tell them to ensure the child gets an education with a degree to fall back on. There is no guarantee. Never, ever. Go to school, work hard and fingers crossed.

I shot several pilots, was an understudy for a huge musical that came into my city. But, my “break” never came. I am grateful for the time I have had trying for it professionally, I now work more in community theatre and enjoy knowing I always have a place here.

You did your best. The most difficult is trying to explain to someone how hard it actually is.

Especially when they have no clue and the fact that if they fall into the “pretty” category they will hear how “easy” it is.

I have a student right now, she got an agent. Has done some commercials, modelling. She HAS talent and an IT factor. Her agent wanted her in L.A. for pilot season, which I agreed with.

But… she flakes out too much, so much so, her father has told her post secondary school would be better until she matures enough and realizes that it is a business that needs to be worked on every single day, a lifestyle to live in. I also agree with him. She currently has no drive right now other than it can be fun for her, she says she wants it, but…

And that is anoth…

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