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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 on 2024-06-27 04:02:02+00:00.

I am NOT OOP. OOP is u/AdMysterious7891

Originally posted to r/jobs & r/antiwork

Previous BoRU #1

[New Updates]: OOP works for an evil Michael Scott

Editor’s Note: added paragraph breaks for readability, changed letters to names. Originally used “Alexis” in the first posts, but switching to Amy based on OOP’s newer updates

Trigger Warnings: manipulation, hostile workplace, sexual harassment, invasion of privacy

Editor’s Notes: due to the lengths of the earlier posts, they have exceeded the character limit. So I made a TL; DR, for each of OOP’s prior posts to the latest updates. This is in order to fit all posts in one BoRU. For the full text bodies and relevant comments from older posts, please see the previous BoRU linked above

RECAP

AITA for appearing annoyed with my new co-worker? (AutoMod): April 9, 2023

OOP (28F) has been at her new job for less than a month. Very stressful when getting the hang of things but fortunately, two people from the department has been very helpful to OOP. It would be at least six months before OOP gets used to the routines. The third co-worker would help with the bulk of OOP’s responsibilities for few months, so OOP doesn’t get overwhelmed.

The third co-worker, “Amy” (Editor’s note: changed letters to names for readability based on OOP’s newer updates), isn’t very helpful. From day one, Amy asked vague questions and expected OOP to be perfect on knowing what she was talking about. Complained to their boss about OOP not doing some tasks. Boss doesn’t care. Left a bad taste for OOP after hearing Amy’s complaining. OOP tries to do a report, Amy sees her struggles with it. Turned out Amy wasn’t ready to help OOP see how reports were done. Amy wasted OOP’s time by complained about emails and making OOP feeling guilty for nothing. The report? Amy couldn’t do it because she claimed the database wasn’t working and it was needed. OOP tells her she will figure things out with the database. OOP asked if she was TA because Amy had been doing lots of OOP’s tasks on top of her own.

Verdict: the post was removed before the verdict was rendered. Based on comments, OOP was NTA

Would you quit because of a coworker at a new job? (deleted post): April 11, 2023 (2 days later)

At her job for a month now, OOP still has no training for her position. Previous employee who had her position was fired. No one else in the department of 4 people (including OOP) knew how to do OOP’s responsibilities. Company asked the retiree who held the same position to show OOP the ropes. Received 2 days’ worth of training because the retiree doesn’t remember anything and stopped after a few weeks because she cared more about her retirement.

Boss is very understanding for OOP being overwhelming. Expects it to be at least six months before OOP gets the handle of things. Still no training done. When asking Amy a work question, she gets mad at OOP every time, claims she told OOP what to do when she didn’t. Expected OOP to know everything! After a mistake, Amy goes straight to Boss to complain about OOP. Boss gets fed up with Amy, shuts her down because OOP is new.

OOP communicates with Amy via emails regarding a report needing to be submitted. Amy sees OOP’s responding email, stumping into her office, demanded OOP to fix her report. After consulting with Boss and IT guy, she refused to admit she was wrong, not OOP. It has been few hours since the report incident, Amy refused to talk to OOP and things are stressful at the office. Boss has said nothing about the whole situation. OOP asked if it was time for her to look for another job or not.

I like my job. But my boss keeps telling me I’m too quiet. Am I the problem? (Wayback Machine): July 17, 2023 (3 months later)

Four months into this job now for OOP. She likes the work, but very quiet and reserved. Boss has an issue with that, tells OOP she should put herself out there more and socialize with other employees at the department. Said he is willing to be OOP’s “best friend” if she lets him lead the icebreakers and conversations. When lunch happens, OOP is invited, but she doesn’t accept. Prefers to have lunch by herself. Had lunch once with her boss and co-worker, things get uncomfortable when discussing about things such as politics for an example.

Was told during my employee review that I should have told my boss I have an older brother.: November 17, 2023 (4 months later)

Editor’s Note: in this next post, OOP has given her boss a name, he will be called “Kevin”

After starting this job, OOP realized she wasn’t going to like it. But tries her best to stick it out as long as she could. Kevin is the “We’re family here” boss. OOP is introverted herself and it has been a recurring point between them. He tells OOP to “get out of her shell more” and to tell him EVERYTHING. Gets mad at OOP because she won’t get up from her desk to go to his office to talk when both of them are cc’d on emails! She has tried to discuss work-related tasks with Kevin, but still not enough for him!

OOP’s neighbor, “Dan”, steps into the picture. Dan is OOP’s older brother’s best friend. OOP’s department starts working with Dan. He tells Kevin he knows OOP. Kevin thinks Dan is OOP’s boyfriend when he is not. Tries to make the chats personally about OOP and Dan, but OOP shuts Kevin down. She notes Dan is like a big brother to her, she has no interests for him. OOP reaches her 90-day review for the department. Kevin repeatedly tells her to socialize more and should had told him about her older brother and Dan. She doesn’t think it was her job to share her personal information. Received 1’s and 2’s out of a scale of 4 since OOP learned her position quickly without any trainings. Is now looking for a new job.

How do you make it through the day with a boss and co-workers you can’t stand?: March 19, 2024 (4 months later)

New update. Said she’s at her wit’s end with her current job with Kevin. She has been looking for new jobs since October. Doesn’t have a new job lined up yet, but for various reasons, OOP is working on leaving her job of one year. The main reason? She cannot stand her boss. Confirmed he is the worst boss because of his comments made regarding various topics. Calls himself “Alpha Male” to people he meets, complains to OOP and asked personal questions she doesn’t want to answer to. Gave OOP the worst employee’s review due to the reasons mentioned. Kevin tells the rest of the co-workers the shit about OOP. They don’t like Kevin either, but because Kevin is the boss, they agree with him on his opinions about OOP.

I’ve gray-rocked my toxic boss and now he’s panicking: April 1, 2024 (2 weeks later)

OOP (28F) is still doing job searching. Getting ready to leave the job because of the toxic and narcissistic boss, Kevin (40sM). Overheard him badmouthing other employees when they are not around. Does the same thing to OOP. Gets mad because he thinks she doesn’t know how to do her job and no one else helped her.

Things Kevin has done to OOP: yell at her in front of the department because she didn’t tell him he was cc’d on emails, gave OOP the worst employee review, only gave $200 for her holiday bonus and complained he only got $10,000 for his bonus, hugs OOP when she didn’t consent and tells her to smile more, and gets co-workers to spy on OOP. She lost her trust in a fellow co-worker who she thought was her friend, only for the co-worker to tell everything to Kevin. Yes, OOP has reported it to HR, but they had done nothing.

OOP tries to stay positive, but tension was getting too much. Gives one-word answers to Kevin when asked questions. Department is gossiping about OOP, wondering if she leaves and they would have to do her tasks. All sudden, Kevin talks loudly, and he told OOP point blank she wasn’t allowed to leave. She had enough of everyone else and decided that leaving was the right choice for herself.

Update: I’ve gray-rocked my toxic boss and now he’s panicking.: April 8, 2024 (1 week later)

OOP receives words of support from her original post! She confirms her boss is still making comments, hoping she won’t leave if she got another job. Gives her “compliments”, thinking she will change her mind and stay longer at the department to face critiques from him and other co-workers. Kevin gets upset when OOP doesn’t greet him at the office. One day when OOP went home, Kevin felt sorry for himself because he believed she has checked out and he doesn’t know what happened.

Boss has made a big deal about OOP’s birthday. Department has a post of monthly birthday list of employees’ birthdays. He was upset there was a mistake with OOP’s birthday, and…

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