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Trigger Warning: bullying; racism & sexism

Mood Spoiler: OOP comes out on top

Original Post: October 25, 2024

I am a 5’1 female and my lab partner constantly makes fun of me for being short. For example, I came back from the bathroom and he said “i thought you fell in the toilet because you’re so tiny”. He also said that ”my hair is so big it makes my head and me look even more tiny”.

I am not insecure about my height nor does making fun of it offend me, but it’s annoying and ironic because he’s short too (looks 5’5/6). And yes I know it might be because he’s interested in me, but I don’t find him attractive so the teasing isn’t “cute”, it’s just very very annoying.

Last lab I had enough of it and basically told him to shut up because he’s “like 5’5”. He said he’s not 5’5 and he’s 5’9. I know I am very short but he is definitely not over 5’7. We started arguing about it so I told him I’ll bring a measuring tape next class and we’ll find out the truth.

I started to feel a bit bad after because I know men are very insecure about their height. However him obviously lying about his height and constantly making fun of me makes me in the mood to be petty.

Will bringing the measuring tape make me the asshole?

edit: I accidentally put “f22” in my title For my lab partner. To correct I am female 20 and my lab partner that makes fun of me is male 22. More explanation as to what he says.

[editor’s note- fixed the title of the BORU for clarity]

Some of OOP’s Comments:

Commenter: NTA

he’s finally found someone shorter than him and it makes him feel superior.

If he can’t take it he shouldn‘t dish it out.

OOP: Do you think me bringing the measuring tape will make me the asshole ?

Commenter: NTA. Bring in the measuring tape and a big, black sharpie. Don’t say a word to him. Go to the doorframe and mark 4’, 5’ and 6 '. Between the 5 and 6 foot marks, place the inches. Remember how parents used to measure kids heights against the wall for doorframe and leave marks for little Susie is so tall on October 31st and Ben is so tall the same date. Don’t say another word to him, just leave the measuring marks so he has to look at them every day as he passes by the chart. Keep direct eye contact with him whenever he walks by it.

OOP: I’m am rolling with laughter. Thank you for this idea I’m definitely going to do this 😂. I was planning on just measuring him but the marks on the wall would be more accurate. I don’t know if I would be allowed to draw on the wall with sharpie though, I may do it with a washable marker instead.

Commenter: NTA, he shouldn’t dish it if he can’t take it, but I don’t know that it’d help to escalate with the tape if you’ll still need to work with him. Can you switch partners?

OOP: No I can’t switch my partner. this is my assigned partner for the rest of the semester. Thankfully I only have 3 classes left.

Commenter (downvoted): He’s definitely trying to flirt with you imo. He wants to emphasize how small you are because it makes him seem/feel bigger and he’s probably not used to that lol. He wants to make it clear that compared to him you’re just cute and small. He’s obviously insecure about his own height. I do think being short has wildly different implications for men/women but it’s not like you decided to do this after he made an offhand comment. You’re clearly annoyed by this and he’s being disruptive and kind of desperate by not shutting the fuck up about it. Measuring tape might be the exact tool you need to show to him why this kind of shit is very bad for him lol.

OOP: i think so too which is why I was hesitant to say anything, I didn’t want to make him more insecure. I don’t think he means it in a harmful way, but it’s just annoying because he mentions it every single lab. However, last class he kept making inappropriate comments about our other lab partner and I “getting married and having babies“. That really crossed the line for me.

I gave him a death stare and told him to stop in all seriousness, because the comments he was making were just making things awkward and uncomfortable. He chose not to listen and keep going thinking he was funny. After that I lost all respect for him.

Commenter: Haha I had a guy worked with once who INSISTED he was 5’8", I literally said we’re the exact same height, and I’m 5’3" dude had the audacity to say someone had LIED TO ME because I was obviously 5’7" or so. NTA don’t let their fragile masculinity bother you. Measure that boy.

OOP: This is absolutely hilarious . This guy said the same thing that I must be 5’5 … so now I’m suddenly not short anymore huh lmao. The audacity of these men to lie by a whole 4 inches thinking people won’t notice is just embarrassing.

OOP adds a bit more from his bullying:

I’ll tell you what I told the other person who said the same thing.

“To clarify he also said “ I thought you fell in the toilet because you’re so tiny”, when I got back because it took a while.

he also said my hair is so big it makes my head and me look even more tiny.

to add on he repeatedly calls me “shorty” or brings up my race saying my people are usually short. when I try to ignore him he just keeps repeating the same thing to annoy me and get a reaction. I love being short So there’s nothing to be sensitive about. It’s him being annoying and making these comments to someone he barely knows, all the while he’s also very short, that bothers me.

oh and I’m bringing the tape.

Edit (Same Post, later that day):

edit:

I am planning to bring this 10ft measuring tape, cut it at 7ft, and taping it to the wall next to us before he gets there. Can’t wait. I will update how it goes by Tuesday night (my class is Tuesday morning).

Update (Same Post): October 30, 2024 (5 days later)

Update: I got to class late because of traffic, so I didn’t have time to tape it up. Also there is no actual wall beside me so nowhere I could really tape it.

But I still measured him. I whipped my tape measure out and they started laughing at first because everyone knew what was about to go down. Before I measured him He asked me what the margin of error is and said “that thing is 2/3 inches off”, we both knew he lied at this point lol. But I insisted to measure him and at first he didn’t want to get measured. I told him to take his shoes off he said he didn’t want to, I said I’m subtracting an inch from the measurement then.

He was five foot seven with the shoes on, so without them he’s actually a little less. Even after I clearly measured him he kept denying it saying it’s wrong, that I measured him wrong and the tape measure is incorrect.

He then looked up “how tall is sixty seven inches“ because he kept saying that must not be five seven.

I couldn’t believe he kept denying it even though i clearly just measured him. His friend (in the lab group across from us), is about the same height as him and also lied about his height last time. So he was embarrassed too because they both were ovbiously lying.

I made a joke about how the top two inches must be invisible and he wasn’t too happy. Our lab TA (6’2) came over and asked what the measuring tape was for, I told him it was to measure his height pointing to my lab partner. I said he lied and the TA started laughing too.

Next week I’m thinking of just taping the measuring tape at the door before class so they’re always reminded of it when they walk in. Theres really nothing more I can do. We both know he lied even if he doesn’t admit it.

Editor’s note: marked as concluded since OOP hasn’t updated and proved her point- everyone knows the kid was lying

WIBTA My lab partner kept making fun of me for being short(f20) so I called him(22) short and he got mad.

WIBTA My lab partner kept making fun of me for being short(f20) so I called him(22) short and he got mad.

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