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The original was posted on /r/hfy by /u/AdventurousRun6351 on 2024-12-22 02:20:21+00:00.

In the last days of the grand war of reptiles, the intergalactic congression, with the aid of the humans of Terra Prime and Ungar of Ugathara, made leaps and bounds in the struggle against the Quzar Lizard Men. Nearly all of the lizard planetary posts had been destroyed or overtaken one after the other, with victory on the horizon. Just when it seemed like total victory was assured, a piece of terrible news rang the ears of the high council, and immediate action was taken.

A small militia was formed within days and sent off to the uninhabited world of Graxgrah. A planet with no intelligent life, nearly twice the size of Terra Prime moon, and covered in thick deciduous forests and long stretches of mountains with streams and lakes wrapping around its equator. A seemingly uninteresting planet worth no notice except for the Quazar Lizard men, who have made a small outpost there for some reason. Perhaps a final stand against all odds? A last-ditch foothold? Who knows?

But when the reason was discovered, a code red was initiated! General Tuxy, a Grollnid, a species of xeno that Terrans describe as looking like their stereotypical description of aliens, took the lead. Being co-lead by the Hierophant Flix, accompanied by five members of the Terrasquawalla species, a group of xenos resembling turtles, and three humans from Terra Prime. Once they made landfall at Graxgrah, the small militia made a small camp to serve the planet and locate the Quazar Lizardmen. The three humans, three fraternal triples known as Jack, Jox, and Jake, set out on their own to do their own service and scope of the planet in the hope of finding anything on the lizards.

While Tuxy wouldn’t normally allow anyone to go out alone, the Terrans were from a class 15 deathworld, and Graxgrah was a class 8. This would be easy for them, and besides, Terrans always made progress on whatever they did. The day they set off, things were good, but when the mandatory update was required, they didn’t call in. It was quickly found that something in Graxgrah’s atmosphere made radio contact impossible! General Tuxy could only hope that the Terrans would see this and return within the day, but they never did.

The day turned to night, and soon, the days passed without the Terrans making any return. General Tuxy could only assume that they had perished, whether to the local fauna or the lizards. But a medical event happened when all three Terrans returned one odd day, about a week after their apparent disappearance! While everyone was glad they weren’t dead, Tuxy was thrilled and immediately grilled the three brothers.

“Where in the name of the seventh moon have you three been?? I would’ve thought the three of you would’ve tried to contact us at the scheduled time, realized this planet couldn’t send radio signals, and then returned to base! But instead, you three went on and vanished for a whole month, making all of us think you died!” he yelled at the triples, his two large black eyes turning shades of red.

The three humans looked nervous at his grilling, and they didn’t know what to say for a long while until Jack, the tallest brother with the curliest hair, told him, “It’s…complicated.”

“I don’t think you’d believe us, even if we told you,” Jox, the middle child of the triples with the blondest and shortest hair, added.

“And-wait, did you say month? We were gone for a month? But I thought it was only a week?” Jake, the youngest and the one with the most freckles, asked in confusion as his brothers also had the same expression.

“It might have felt like a week to you, but it has been a month. Time on this planet flows differently,” Flix told the three as Tuxy claimed himself down.

Tuxy grumbled something to himself while pulling in his face. After calming down a bit, he fixed his combat gear and vest while telling the triplets they were to be resigned to civil and janitorial duty unless they actually had something on the lizards and not just goofed off for the last month. Something that the three men smiled at early on as they took out several maps, scanner copies, pictures, and various other such things, spreading them over a folding table. They went one by one and explained what they found out about the lizards. They even triangulated several ways to get around their defenses, ground troops, and sensors, giving them the optimal route to where their actual base of operation was.

Tuxy was generally surprised by this and almost elated that they fulfilled their mission with such ease! Perhaps this mission would go even faster than normal. Humans really did make a difference. Even though he wanted to punish them for not coming back right away, he knew they clearly didn’t know about the planet, and they did just make this potential long-winded stakeout and intel recovery much faster! Now they could get straight to the fun part, where they ran in, going bang bang on everything that moved!

So he told the three brothers that they were on kitchen and cleanup duty for the remainder of their time on the planet, which they accepted. Tuxy gathered the rest of the militia around the table and laid out their game plan, which would be completed by sunrise tomorrow. They would combine three of the humans’ mapped routes into one to avoid detection and get as close to the lizard’s main base as quickly as possible before they finished what they were doing. With that, he dismissed them.

The group dispersed to return to whatever they were doing before the three brothers went off to freshen up after being away from a shower for over a month and smelled like it, too. Once they had been cleaned up in the ship’s onboard shower and returned to the outside camp, they began to work on preparing dinner for everyone. A task easier said than done. While humans could eat anything so long as it was cleaned, well-cooked, and had a bit of flavor, the other three species had very specific dietary requirements.

Grollnids needed their food made with as much water as possible. Hierophants, despite having stomaches like humans, primarily ate meat, which had to be raw or alive. The Terrasquawalla mostly ate vegetables but had to have them sullied in dirt or muck as it helped their gut bacteria. So, by the time they finished everyone else’s extremely crazy supper, they were too tired to make anything more complex and just threw whatever was left into a quick stew.

As they sat and ate with the group, Jox struck up a conversation with Flix as he was swallowing his meal whole. Casually asking him, “So, care to explain how a whole dang month has passed in our absence?”

“The same reason that the Quazar Lizardmen have taken a liking to this planet.”, Flix replied after his mouth wasn’t full of food but watched as the bulge slithered down his extended neck.

“And that would be?”, Jox inquired further.

After the food finally made it to his stomach, Flix gave a small burp before replying vaguely, “The core of this planet is filled with a very rare substance known as Chronoium.” the bothers all looked at him confused as Flix sighed in exasperation before telling them, “It’s a rare rock that affects time itself. It’s used on our wrap drives so spaceships and space stations easily move millions of light years in seconds without the use of a wormhole. A small fragment can be used to send a mega class space station 1.3 billion light-years on just it alone.”

“So that’s what that weird rock is I see in the engine room?” Jake stated aloud in a thinking tone while sipping on his spoon.

“Yes, and they are very valuable. The high council had no idea a planet had a core made up of it.”, Tuxy added.

“Until the lizards.”, Jack inquired.

“Until the lizards,” Tuxy agreed while slurping the rest of his meal, which was basically water-logged food of different varieties. Setting his bowl down, he stood up and instructed the group, “Get some rest, boys; we have a tough day ahead of us, and hopefully, the last one on this planet.”

Before the sun rose the next day, the small militia had already awoken and geared up. They were already making their way through the thickest grove of trees to avoid being separated from the lizard tech or their natural senses, knowing full well that the planet’s pine trees gave off such a pungent aroma that it masked even the smelliest Terrasquawalla—and they had three! By the time the first rays of light had shown through the horizon, the group had already made it halfway without a single lizard in sight, which was equal parts a good and bad thing.

This was good because they didn’t need to fight prematurely and alert others, but it was bad because the Terrans’ report said that they were very spread out. So where were they? By the time they reached the halfway point, the group had realized far too late that they had ascended a mountain that led to a sheer-faced cliff with an imminent drop! Tuxy looked all over and around the area, looking for an easy way to get across that didn’t involve climbing down several thousands of feet down and up again, going around, or trying to get across with jet boosters and grapple lines that wouldn’t reach before they failed and fell.

Tuxy cheeked the map and realized that this cliff was on it, but he got his wires crossed somewhere along the way and didn’t realize it, so blaming the Terran was a no-go. This was on him, and they needed to move fast since the lizards were up to something. So he stamped his foot and yelled, "Dammit…

Content cut off. Read original on https://old.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/1hjp427/humans_can_make_friends_with_anything_part_1/