This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/citiesskylines by /u/WarDevourerr on 2025-01-31 13:45:04+00:00.

The year is 2036, and I boot up Cities: Skylines 2’s newest DLC “Individual Blade of Grass Creator Pack” ($79.99). As my quantum PC’s 256GB of RAM struggles to handle my 100k population city, I notice that my citizens are still using the same intersection despite having 47 alternative routes.

I open the road builder to fix traffic by adding my 156th bypass highway. The AI tells me it’s “too curvy” despite being perfectly straight. I finally place it, only to realize all my cargo trucks now prefer to do a 720-degree loop through a residential area rather than use my new highway.

Checking my city’s needs, I notice that despite having 400 crematoriums, bodies are piling up in a single house while every hearse in the city drives in circles around an empty park. Meanwhile, my entire industrial district has no workers because everyone has a PhD, but my university is empty because all the students are stuck in traffic.

I place down the new Ultra-Mega-Smart-Junction™ asset from the workshop, which immediately causes every vehicle in my city to merge into a single lane and drive through a kindergarten playground.

As garbage piles up in front of the garbage processing plant (staffed by 500 workers who all live next door), I realize my water system is somehow pumping sewage upstream against gravity. Before I can fix it, half my city dies from drinking poop water, while the other half is stuck in an eternal traffic jam trying to reach the hospital across the street.

As I watch my city collapse because one random building decided to spontaneously catch fire and every fire truck in the city is stuck trying to make a right turn, I realize the true cities were the skylines we lined along the way.