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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/thefarzin on 2025-04-03 10:51:27+00:00.

my friend idris recently shared this wild story from his first job, and i’m still shook.

idris was 17 when he started at this grimy call center. back home, he’s got a whole crew of geese in his yard—he’s obsessed with them, treats them like pets, and has a favorite named blinchik (russian for “pancake”). he brought a little wallet-sized photo of blinchik to work, just to keep his spirits up in that depressing dump. but his boss, dave, saw it and flipped out. dave had this hardcore rule: “no personal items on your desk. it’s about professionalism.” meanwhile, his own desk was a trash heap—old mugs, random figurines, even some rusty fish statue. idris says dave had these weird ticks: he’d go from passive-aggressive whispers to fake-nice vibes in a heartbeat. total oddball.

anyway, dave clocked the goose photo and went nuclear. he made idris rip it to shreds in front of everyone, muttering about “rule-breaking.” idris, just a 17-year-old kid, froze—he had no clue how to stand up for himself back then and just did it. he says he almost cried but held it together so he wouldn’t look weak in front of the team. blinchik’s photo was toast, and dave smirked like he’d just won something.

idris wasn’t letting it slide. dave want me to obey? I’ll maliciously comply with him. next day, he rolled in with nothing—no pen, no notepad, no headset. when dave asked what the deal was, idris hit him with, “you said no personal items. i’m waiting for the company to hook me up.” dave lost it, but idris doubled down: “it’s your rule.” the team jumped in—half of them stopped bringing their stuff too, and the whole operation tanked. customers were raging on the phones, calls were dropping, and dave was scrambling to make everyone “work normal.” eventually, he caved and mumbled, “fine, bring what you need, just keep it lowkey.” idris came back with a fresh blinchik photo and slapped it on his desk. dave didn’t say squat.

but it gets crazier. a couple weeks later, dave tried to fire idris for “insubordination.” idris, now sharper, had recorded the whole “no personal items” freakout on his phone (legal where we’re at) and sent it to hr with a rundown of dave’s hypocrisy. hr didn’t axe dave, but they gave him a slap on the wrist, and he chilled out. then the real bomb hit. turns out dave had been skimming cash from the petty cash box for years—small grabs, but steady. idris says he cooked up the rule obsession to keep everyone stressed and off his trail. he’d snag money from the drawer—supposedly for coffee, paper, office junk—and mark it as “office needs.” it added up to a hefty chunk, though no one’s dropped an exact number. his weird mix of passive-aggressive jabs and over-the-top strictness kept newbies like idris too spooked to dig deeper. that photo meltdown? idris figures dave was just flexing to throw everyone off his scent.

dave got busted when a senior coworker noticed the “office expenses” weren’t lining up. they canned him, and later even filed charges. idris says he’s still stoked about how he accidentally took down a crook by playing dave’s own dumb game. blinchik’s still chilling in his yard with the rest of the geese, honking at anyone who steps too close. so, reddit, what’s the call? is idris the king of payback