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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Choice_Evidence1983 on 2024-03-30 05:00:06.
I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/Zepilawae
Originally posted to r/AmItheAsshole & r/amiwrong
AITA for ditching the surprise birthday party that my parents threw for me?
Trigger Warnings: infidelity, emotional abuse and manipulation, body shaming, exploitation, coercion
Original Post: November 23, 2023
I(19m) dated ‘Emily’(18f) for three years. Her dad is not just my parents’ boss but also their best friend. She is basically the daughter my mom never had, always complimenting my mom’s cooking and coming over for cooking lessons since she was only 10.
Emily and I broke up after she cheated on me but she has asked me to give her a second chance. My mom asked me to think about it and my dad also said he wants to see us end up together but every time they brought her up I said no.
Three days ago, they threw a surprise party, with about 10 people there. I say it’s a surprise since normally they just give me some cash and tell me to buy a new book from a bookstore. No parties.
Would have went alright had it not been for the fact that they invited Emily over. It was very awkward with me giving a tense smile and saying a very strained hello. Had lunch with everyone. Then she sat next to me on the couch and placed one of her hands on my thigh.
At that point I panicked. I was startled and I told everyone ‘Thanks for coming, but I have to go now.’
Went to a bookstore and didn’t go home until two hours later. My mom was very upset with me and said that I should have been a better host than to just leave before our guests. She is still annoyed at me for my ‘impropriety’ today.
VERDICT: NOT THE ASSHOLE
Top Comments
kurokomainu: NTA They set you up so of course they thought what they did was fine and you were in the wrong for not going along with it – fact is, they put you in a terrible position. They deliberately made it so you’d feel obligated to stay and be polite when your real desire would be to leave. They wanted to pressure you to get back with your ex using the whole situation for that purpose.
You endured as much as you could and then your ex pushed things further by putting her hand on your leg. You did well not to leave straight from the start when you saw her, and I wouldn’t blame you if you had.
Tell your parents and any other flying monkey that they know as well as you do that you were set up and you did nothing wrong by leaving when you did. You don’t owe them making up with your cheating ex just to be polite.
Unusual_academic: NTA. This was not a party for you but an event for your parents to get you and Emily in the same room. Your parents have firmly violated your boundaries in favour of Emily.
Am I wrong for calling my dad a pimp for what he said when drunk?: March 5, 2024
I(19m) was in a serious relationship with ‘Emily’(18f). Her dad is both my dad’s friend and boss. We were together for three years before she cheated on me. Each time she asked me to take her back, I told her no.
Last night, my dad came home drunk from an office party. He said that Emily’s dad promised him a promotion and big pay raise if I’d get back together with Emily. Then he told me to just ‘close [my] eyes and think of England’ before laughing at what he said.
I told him ‘Sure, pimp.’ He was too drunk to get mad at me. Mom was sober though and quickly chewed me out for that. She said I shouldn’t judge him based on what he says when he’s drunk and that ‘alcohol makes people say ridiculous things.’ That there’s a good chance it’s all in his head.
It’s morning now but he hasn’t woken up yet. Am I the asshole?
UPDATE : He woke up. I asked him and he said he was serious. His boss did make him that offer and he expects me to go along. He told me to try to forget what she did and just ‘keep her happy.’
Top Comment
neophenx: NTA. It’s not the most respectful thing to say to your dad, but then again, a dad telling his son he needs to be with this girl for career advancement is very… medieval of him. Even if drunk, that’s pretty low, treating your child’s relationship as your stepping stone to success.
UPDATE : Am I wrong for calling my dad a pimp for what he said when drunk?: March 23, 2024
I made a deal with my dad. I told him I’ll get back together with my ex if he allows me to adopt a dog, and my dad said yes. So I have a Labrador now.
All I have to do is put up with Emily and nod along when she justifies her cheating by saying that she only did it because I’m too small down there. Whatever, I guess.
DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP
Dad sold his son. Assuming she didn’t learn her lesson and still cheating maybe he should just start cheating too? That way she gets annoyed and break it off.