This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/headholes-specialist on 2023-10-04 00:20:14.

My brother’s (28M) been living with me (31F) for about 1 year since he became unemployed due to mental disabilities. I’m still a doctor in training, so overworked and underpaid. Still, I don’t ask him to split rent or bills so he can focus on healing, and hopefully get back on his feet.

He spends a substantial amount of time playing video games & chatting online. It’s not really my business, so while I’m disappointed, it’s his choice and life, I can only do so much.

On my off day, I was home doing some cleaning and laundries. He went to see his psychiatrist, so I took this opportunity to clean his room because he gets annoyed when I do it while he games/chat. Sticky half empty soda cups everywhere, clothes on the ground, and bin overstuffed with trash as usual. Anyways.

When I was rolling his socks, and putting them in the storage bin, I saw a bra & pair of panties buried in there. I was shocked & didn’t really know what to think at first sight. Barring what’s obviously disturbing, those were expensive lingerie sets I bought from VS like ~$50, and like I said I’m not exactly making bank.

When he came back, I asked him how my bra & panties are in his storage bin. (I admit,I may have been a little aggressive with language)

He told me he was trying them on, and forgot to put them back. I had an absolute meltdown, and told him he’s now on his own, and to make plans to move out by next year.

He cried, kept reiterating it’s not a big deal, and said I’m an a$$ hat for lacking sympathy and a bigot. Later he told me he struggles with his sexuality (never spoke to me about this btw), and said I’m making him feel bad about him being himself (or herself).

Idk how I feel. Maybe I need a week or two, but I just feel so angry, confused, and disgusted. I look at my wardrobe and I want to throw everything away. He said he didn’t wear anything else, but idk if I can ever trust him.

Edit: We are Taiwanese Americans, and for cultural reasons I’m obligated to take care of him for now, his lifestyle is not the point. I’m not phobic, and I’m not disgusted by his sexuality, but for wearing my undies & bra (one cos I’m his sister and it’s just weird, two he didn’t even ask me)