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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/GoldDustBlonde on 2023-10-04 01:21:34.


I (45f) am the daughter of a wonderful parent, who, unfortunately, is facing the final chapter. My parent needs full time care, as they suffer from Alzheimer’s. My aunt recently came to visit her sibling, and had an attitude the entire time she was here. When I finally pressed for an answer to “what’s wrong are you okay?” She went off on me about how my parent shouldn’t have to live in this place. She told me I am selfish for not having my parent at home with me, and was very critical of the care my parent is getting.

The facility is very highly rated. I vetted several recommended through a social worker before I chose this one. Is it perfect? No. Nothing is. But they are safe, which is the main worry with an Alzheimer’s patient.

Also, my parent is combative. My aunt doesn’t see it, but it is true. My aunt lives across the country and only makes it out here a few times a year.

I have a full time job and two teenagers at home. I cannot care for my parent full time. I just can’t. I feel bad enough about this without her piling on the guilt trip.

I am the sole power of attorney. I told my aunt I can have her banned if she doesn’t keep her opinions to herself, and of course that only made her even madder. She does not get how hard this is. My grandparents died in a car crash and she never had to deal with this horrible disease and these difficult decisions.

So AITA?