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The original was posted on /r/asoneafterinfidelity by /u/SlateRoof on 2023-10-04 10:33:35.

We’re 7 months out and I’ll be brutally honest now. We’re better than we’ve ever been and I’m healed. I sleep well, I don’t have triggers anymore because there is nothing to trigger. Whenever I think about it, I just say thanks brain for wanting to keep me safe but I already am. Then I move on and it doesn’t affect my mood at all. I even thought about the affair and the worst things on purpose during sex and it did nothing to me. You probably know what I’m getting at. Lately I’ve also been excessively browsing this sub and supportforwaywards and I think I do it because I want (sic!) to be pulled back into this world. I tell myself it takes 2-5 years according to experts and the people on here. I can’t move on after 7 months, can I?

But why can’t I? I’ve forgiven her, I couldn’t be any happier with the person she’s become, I love the marriage we have now and there is no more pain. She isn’t healed yet. There’s still lots of shame, guilt and self-loathing. But she’s in therapy and a couple of days ago she’s managed to show herself some grace for the first time when she was triggered badly.

And here I am. Holding onto this in secret with no reason to do so. This is a shitty club but all of you mean a lot to me. I don’t think there are many places where you can find this much support and compassion. I need you to do your magic one last time. Please tell me how to walk out the door and get lost. Please tell me it’s OK and tell me you hope to never see me again.