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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Roommate_Throwaway09 on 2023-10-04 17:34:39.

My (20f) roommate (20f) has a boyfriend (24m). We currently live in a college dorm and we’re randomly assigned. My roommates boyfriend lives in Texas and I have only met him in passing one other time. Last night he flew in at midnight and they got back to the room not too long after. They were talking with each other which in my opinion is not a big deal. Around 1ish I heard him ask if I was asleep and she said she didn’t know. He then told her to be quiet and well there was a gasp. At this point I was having an anxiety attack and grabbed my keys and drove home (about an hour).

This morning she texted asking where I was and I told her I drove home and I’m not ok with him sleeping over so he either needs to find a place or I need some gas money to commute from home. She texted back asking if we could talk about it or give more strict rules. That it was ‘not sex’ and he was ‘feeling on me like a more intense cuddle.’ Then offered the strict rules of no staying up talking (not a big deal to me), no kissing, and no feeling up while I’m in the room.

They do tend to lean more traditional and I’m thinking the definition of sex used in her text is penetration. I feel like feeling up while someone is in the room to the point of being told not to make to much noise and gasping is part of sex. My back was turned towards them so I didn’t see anything but wtf is an ‘intense cuddle?’ Foreplay? That’s part of sex.

WIBTA For saying he needs to find somewhere else to stay or they need to give me some gas money?

Edit: I gave them a schedule of when I’m not going to be in the room and will be out for most of the weekend. I feel like the “intense cuddle” is just semantics.