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The original was posted on /r/twohottakes by /u/Mundane_Lime_2168 on 2023-10-07 10:14:37.

So me (53M) and my wife Rose (53F) had our older daughter Sarah (31F) when we were 22. We were young and broke, but managed and now we raised Sarah the best we could. She got pregnant at 15. It was a very depressing time for her, she had to go to therapy, and never told us anything about the father, which always upset her, so we never pushed the issue.

She originally wanted to terminate, but kept canceling, and eventually told us she wanted to give her up for adoption. But five months into the pregnancy, when she was discussing with a social worker for a couple to adopt, the couple dropped out of the adoption. After trying to find more couples, Sarah asked us if we wanted to adopt. Me and Rose were both 38 at this point, and we had both been discussing having another child, so we ended up adopting our daughter Ellie when Sarah had her at 16. Two years after Ellie, me and my wife had our son Logan (13) biologically. Growing up we always planned on telling Ellie she was adopted, but we knew with telling her that, we had to tell her Sarah was her bio mother.

Sarah never became close with Ellie, not even as siters. She moved out after the birth and lived with Roses sister. She has always shown sisterly love to her Logan, but never towards Ellie. There has always been conflicting feelings with Sarah I have seen posts on Sarah’s Instagram where she posted a picture of what was supposed to be the five of us, but Ellie was cut out. I confronted her about this and she says its too painful. However, a couple years ago she showed up drunk begging us to let us see her “daughter”. We talked to her and let her stay but did not let her near Ellie since she was drunk. We found out from her husband she had suffered several miscarriages and was told to consider a surrogate.

She ended up doing that four years ago and has since had twins Jack and Jill (3M and F) who are biologically hers. Ellie has loved being an aunt to the twins and Sarah has encouraged this with Ellie, and has been inviting Ellie over her house for family time with Logan, who loves being an uncle. We have asked Sarah that in light of the twins, and Ellie being close to them, wouldn’t it be time to tell Ellie the truth, but Sarah keeps claiming she is not ready.

Recently Ellie came to us and has told us she is pregnant. This time it is a completely different situation, we have met the father, he is a child hood friend of hers and they decided they wanted to lost their virginities to each other. We had the talk with Ellie long ago, as we did with Sarah. We approached the situation calmly and have since met with the father and his parents. Ellie is insistent on keeping the baby. She is 3 months along. We have not told Sarah yet, we do not know how to approach the situation, we dont know how she will be able to take it. Me and my wife are considering telling Ellie the truth but we need Sarah to be there.