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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/ZoroisZaddy on 2023-10-10 23:24:40.
Well technically today, I had to fix my utter mistake from a few days ago, but I also didn’t realize how royally I fucked up until today. How did I get to everything dies eventually? Good nonexistent question.
About a month ago, my Opa passed away. My partner and I attended with our 3 kids (two 5 yrs and a 3 yr old). I am age appropriately honest with my kids. They also ask a shit ton of questions so it is just easier to tell the truth. This is the first funeral they have attended with a casket and an open one at that. This event is what has sparked a month long conversation about dying with my son. My son has always been sensitive. He has a super big heart and really doesn’t like being sad. His sisters are… not the same. With my daughter’s, the death of my Opa only sparked a few questions with some follow ups the following day. With my son, it kept expanding and stayed constant with questions until a couple days ago when I clearly fucked up.
My son was talking about his Gigi (my mother). I’m only half listening because he is always talking about something. He grabs my full attention and says “mom, I don’t want gigi to die.” This not being the first time I’ve heard this, I say “okay.” The first time he said this, I told him that she wouldn’t die until she was really old (this is a lie, I’m surprised she has survived this long for other reasons). He didn’t like this answer and had been proclaiming he didn’t want gigi to die every couple of days. Well, he didn’t stop there this day. He then said he didn’t want me or daddy to die. To this I said “me either baby. But I won’t die for a really long time. I promise.” This was also not acceptable to him. He said “no, I don’t want you to die at all.” So I explained that everything eventually dies. Trees, animals, bugs, even clothes as they degrade over time. I even brought the circle of life into it in hopes that would allow him to understand. This was also wrong. He cried and I held him while saying it would be okay. He moved on with his day and didn’t bring it up again… until today.
Today, I was reading a book with some headphones on to drown out the loudness of everything when I see my son doing his fake cry, bouncing trick he does when he upset about something but it’s not full on tears ready. I ask him what’s wrong and after a few times of him mumbling and me asking what, I finally decipher that he “doesn’t want to grow and get big anymore because if I get big then I will die and I don’t want to die.” I repeat back what I heard as a question to make sure I am right. He confirms and busts into tears. My heart broke and I knew I fucked up. I had to hold him and tell him that if he didn’t want to die, he didn’t have to. I told him I’d live with him forever too.
TL;DR: I told my son that everything dies and a couple days later he breaks down and tells me he doesn’t want to grow up because he doesn’t want to die.