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The original was posted on /r/scams by /u/unniebunnie12 on 2023-11-05 21:31:41.


Following a divorce with my dad in 2016, my mom, at 52 started talking to a Nigerian man. She kept it private at first and my older siblings didn’t notice. Im the youngest sibling and the only one living with her so I noticed they video chatted and texted daily.

My mom is disabled, quite overweight, hasn’t worked in well-over a decade, and doesn’t leave the house unless for errands. After talking to him for a year, she went to Nigeria for 2 weeks without telling anybody except me, her 16 year old son at the time. She didn’t have enough money for a plane ticket home so she had to borrow $600 from me since I was working at the time. She lied to my siblings about going but they found out and immediately cut her off and treated her with disdain. We also found out that she got married to him while over there.

She’s been sending him money the entire time, first as in-person wire transfers and now through one of those apps (Remitly). She cut contact with any family or friends that weren’t supportive of her. I did my best to not confront her often as I was scared of being kicked out since I had started college. I’ve recently realized how bad it is as I’ve started going through her phone.

She sends $100’s monthly and occasionally $500’s to him. She’s spent thousands on immigration paperwork and lawyers. She buys things and keeps it in her drawer for him to finally come one day. His visa case is already DECLINED as I found out this weekend through an email she tried to hide. She’s done all of this meanwhile, asking me, her college student son, to help pay bills and go to food pantries. She sold the car that we shared while I was doing a study abroad year. I had to pay for my own car through student loans once I returned so that I can continue going to work and school. She’s had my grandma move in, and uses a portion of rent money from my grandma to send to him.

She’s stated on several occasions that she would pick him over me. I’m not in a financial position to move out. I don’t really know what to do anymore.