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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/nexunis on 2023-11-06 19:41:46.


I (18M) am bisexual and I havent come out to my father yet because of his homophobia. He claims he isn’t and that he would love his children regardless, but he still says some…pretty homophobic stuff.

So I still live at home with my dad, and me and him share a first name (I’m sure now you see where this is going).

One night after getting paid, I get the idea to order a dildo online. I may be bi but I’ve never actually had that kind of experience so I wanted to try it out.

Well in the past I’ve always made sure to order things under my middle name. HOWEVER, when I was putting in my information on the website to order the toy, it had auto filled in my information and I didn’t think about it.

Well I get home from work a few days later, and my dad comes up to me and asks me “Hey when you order packages, you use your middle name right?” And as soon as he said those words. I knew. So I played it off and told him yes, I always put my middle name. He then asked me if I had ordered a dildo and I denied it.

He starts getting mad thinking someone is playing a prank on him and starts calling all his friends trying to see who sent him the dildo.

And I’m just playing along like “Oh maybe it was your sister telling you to go fuck yourself” and blah blah blah.

Every now and then he’ll ask me if I did it and I just keep denying it. He even checked my online bank statements (which thankfully it didn’t show up…not sure why it didn’t but yeah).

So yeah. Now my $50 vibrator belongs to my dad and his ego is bruised thinking someone pranked him.

TL;DR I ordered a dildo online to experiment and because me and my dad have the same first name he thought it was his package and opened it.