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The original was posted on /r/mousereview by /u/RivenIsMyWaifu420 on 2023-11-28 16:57:14.

As the tittle says my lack of success in any and all games of the FPS genre really just boils down to not having the perfect mouse and I’m willing to go bankrupt to fix this issue (I have exactly 190$ to my name)

Now you might be confused, you might have heard that hardware can only get you so far and that you are gonna be looking at a mere 5% improvement, if that, by getting a more suitable piece of equipment, but let me ask you a question if this is what you think:

Do you believe in yourself?

If you do why blame yourself, doubt yourself? Chipping away at the supreme confidence needed to become the very best. No, that is not the way.

I know you are still not convinced, so let me ask you another question:

Who would win the war, the Romans of the old age or the U.S.A right now?

That’s right, that’s the difference between someone with the perfect mouse and someone with a mediocre mouse. And that’s why I’ve decided to make my own mouse, a definitive and ultimate weapon for those select ones that dare win.

A shape molded by the secret cabal of aim kings, an ever changing, never before seen shape, a mysterious click feeling never experienced before by anyone ever, a wormhole law breaking instant wireless alien technology, and a biotechnological semi sentient sensor for unseen aim on top of it all.

Specs:

• Sub 1kg weight
• Undefined shape, will remain so even when it gets delivered to you.
• Battery will outlast you
• Might never get released
• Pre-order now for just 190$

God bless you all.