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The original was posted on /r/hobbydrama by /u/RemnantEvil on 2024-01-24 09:38:30.
I’ve done long-winded posts in the Hobby Scuffles threads, both to encourage recognition of what is a pretty fascinating sport and as an outlet for a renewed interest in what took up a pretty big part of my childhood. I was prompted by recent unusual happenings in the sport – the controversial stumping of Bairstow in the ’23 Ashes – to then do a run of snippet stories with some women’s cricket, the penultimate Ashes match, its anticlimax, then the final match, one of the greatest batting performances in history, and the greatest comeback in World Cup history.
The laws of cricket are obtuse and mysterious at the best of times, so I cannot invest an entire tome to explaining specifics. If you have questions in the comments, I will answer them there – I’m at the character limit as is. And since there are three types of cricket, ranging from “an evening” to “five full days of competition”, there are so many dry spots where nothing of interest happens, so I’m going for a medley of tales about inarguably the best country at the sport, over the century that the country has even existed in its present form.
There are 12 nations that play cricket on the international stage, with a few more on the periphery (e.g. the Netherlands). International cricket is only going to really be mentioned in the context of these 12 - Afghanistan, Australia, Bangladesh, England, India, Ireland, New Zealand, Pakistan, South Africa, Sri Lanka, West Indies, and Zimbabwe. You could pare it down even further to remove countries that are rarely competitive.
There’s also domestic cricket and club cricket. Domestic is obviously dependent on the country; in Australia, it’s called the Sheffield Shield and is an interstate competition. The Shield is a solid proving ground for talent where players for the Australian side earn their spurs. Club cricket, sometimes called grade cricket, is just the amateur stuff that anyone from six-year-olds to over-age clubs play.
To start, before getting into some poor behaviour, do yourselves a favour and watch the Bluey episode ‘Cricket’. For reference, “Six and out” is a backyard cricket staple; if you hit the ball over the fence, it’s worth six runs but you’re also out. That discourages people belting the tennis ball, because someone has to go knock on the neighbours’ door to ask for the ball back, or a parent has to lob a child over the fence to get the sneaky return. (My godmother shared a back fence with the Waugh family, so it was always funny to have to go knock on the door of Mrs Waugh to ask for our ball back. You’ll hear the Waugh name later.)
‘Cricket’ was voted the country’s favourite episode of Bluey, a show already dear to our hearts.
I suppose I’ll start with a downer, and one of the staples of sledging – “Same old Aussies, always cheating.”
O Brother, Where Art Thou Morals?
This is the underarm bowling incident of 1981. It’s considered one of the worst displays of sportsmanship in the history of cricket, and if not the worst, then a top five contender.
The year is (obviously) 1981, and Australia’s playing the third of three one-day internationals against our cousins from New Zealand. ODIs are 50-over games, although obviously the game can end sooner if the batting team loses all ten wickets. Australia batted first and set a total of 235.
With the series tied 1-1, this would mean a rematch is played. There are a number of ways to solve inconclusive matches or series, but these days, a series would just end at 1-1.
You can find videos of the incident on YouTube, but I can give the breakdown. We reach the last delivery of the game – and it’s Trevor Chappell bowling. Trevor’s brother is Greg, the Australian captain. The New Zealanders scored some runs this over, but also lost two wickets. They are 8/229 –that’s eight wickets down, 229 runs scored. Since you couldn’t lose two wickets in a single delivery, victory by claiming wickets is off the table for Australia. That leaves only one option, which is to prevent New Zealand scoring six runs off the last delivery to tie the game. A win for NZ is possible but unlikely – either a no ball or a wide is an extra run to New Zealand, plus the delivery must be bowled again, so New Zealand could get the extra and score a six.
If you haven’t brushed up on any of the old posts, you might have caught a clue in the Bluey episode: six runs is hitting the ball over the boundary without the ball touching the ground between your bat and the boundary. This might give you some clue where this all leads.
Greg goes over to talk to his brother. This is not uncommon; captains will converse with bowlers often to figure out what type of delivery would work best and whether fielders need to be repositioned. In this scenario, there isn’t really much to discuss since anything less than a six is a win for Australia.
Greg points at the ground. We cannot hear their conversation – a modern development since 1981 includes microphones in the stumps for broadcasters to use – but it’s clear that the people on the pitch understand what’s happening. The two umpires have a brief chat… Then Greg walks away from Trevor to take his position in the field. The New Zealand batter, Brian McKechnie, is no longer holding his bat, which is weird. The Australian wicket-keeper has his arms crossed. Apparently, when a bowler changes his delivery style, he informs the umpire and batter, which is evidently what occurred and wasn’t captured on camera.
To tell you how unsporting this was, the wicket-keeper is seen telling Trevor not to do it. Even though it would be an easy win, he wants nothing to do with this behaviour. McKechnie picks up his bat, finally, and takes his place. And… sure enough, Trevor rolls the ball along the ground. McKechnie blocks, then throws his bat away.
Two things to consider: firstly, it is physically impossible to hit a ball that’s on the ground with enough power, at enough of an angle, that it will get off the ground and clear the boundary without touching the ground; secondly, this was an entirely legal delivery. The batters walk off, briefly pausing for the wicket-keeper to catch up and offer handshakes – both as the custom for the conclusion of the game, and likely as a conciliatory gesture.
The kiwi captain goes out to speak to the umpires, but there’s nothing they can do. Interestingly, there are some domestic tournaments where there is a rule against rolling the ball along the pitch, and the kiwi captain had played in one, but that rule was not enforced in this international match.
Australian commentators were quick to pile on. Bill Lawry said in the moment, a rather understated, “This is possibly a little disappointing.” Richie Benaud, the golden voice of Australian cricket, said, “I think it was a disgraceful performance […] and I think it should never be permitted to happen again.” He summed it up as “one of the worst things I have ever seen on a cricket field.”
I don’t wish to understate Richie Benaud’s significance here. He passed away eight years ago, and cricket fans still dress up as him. Though he was a cricketer in the ‘50s, achieving milestones as the first player to reach 200 Test wickets and 2,000 runs, he is most fondly remembered as the voice of cricket, hence tributes to him are not as a cricketer, but as the man with the microphone.
The incident naturally resulted in a rule change, much like if you tried to let your dog play basketball – one would think it’s not something you need to rule against.
Interesting fact: Ian Chappell, the third brother, holds the record for the first six ever hit in ODI cricket. I’m telling you, cricket lore runs deep.
McKechnie says he holds no grudge, while Greg would recover his esteem before retiring in ’84. He’s spoken of the incident with regret, but it was not severe enough to end his career and he would seek roles in coaching and commentary after retiring from the game.
Trevor never quite achieved much in cricket relative to his brother, and seems to mostly have played domestic cricket. Though he was following the direction of both captain and older brother, much of the stink fell on Trevor, and he’s the one who ultimately rolled the delivery. He doesn’t speak about it very often and seems to be quite ashamed of it, and certainly it has to be one of those awful things that one does that unfortunately becomes their albatross.
Had this happened in the 2010s or 2020s, Australia would never live it down. Fortunately, it comes from a quaint time in the game where men dressed like bad porn parod…
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