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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/G_the_mini_amazing on 2023-07-18 00:53:08.

TIFU: Need to get this off my chest and I’m too mortified to tell anyone in my friends or family group! Please read on for a story of sheer stupidity and a case of the midnight munchies gone wrong!

Let me start by stating that this is the most idiotic thing I’ve ever done, and it started with a bad habit. I need to listen to spoken word to fall asleep (YouTube/radio etc), so I used my right AirPod to help me drift off whilst giving my other ear the pillow. This will never be happening again.

At stupid o’clock this morning, I was dreaming that I was taking my daily vitamins (exhilarating dreams for me) and I remember feeling what I thought were 2 vitamins in my mouth but they were stuck together. In my half asleep state, I tried to dislodge them with my tongue. Failing, I reached for my water and took a large gulp to get the “vitamins” down…. It took some doing.

The pain going down my throat woke me up properly and I realised my rather expensive mistake. I bolted up towards the bathroom to make myself sick. No dice! I cut my throat trying in my panic. Nothing was dislodging the bastard!

After about 5 mins, I gave up and had to wake my partner up. He woke up in a daze thinking the dog had eaten my AirPod, only to see my tomato face covered in sheer panic and tears. He very calmly called emergency advice services for me, whilst I tried to induce vomiting again.

Cut to an hour later: I’m sitting in A&E, in a rougher part of town, stuck in a cubical, in a hospital robe (arse showing off to the world), just had an x-ray and listening to the dulcet tones of the local drunk threatening the nurses for daring to be kind to him. My midnight munching habits have gotten me into some trouble. To add insult to injury, every time I burp, the AirPod “connects” to my phone!! Technology is openly mocking me at this point!

After 3 hours waiting (enduring the drunk’s nonsense but lifted by a very lovely nurse telling me stories of others’ stupidity to cheer me up) I am seen by a doctor. Recommendation: it’s gotta come out the opposite way it came in…… eat lots of fibre……

Cue a day of eating as much fibrous food as I can to get the AirPod out of my stomach and into my digestive tract. Finally, 15 hours after this faux-pas, it’s out!! It’s still charging, connecting and currently wrapped up in a disinfectant saturated cloth. Getting geared up to buy a new one… there are some things that you just can’t forget where they’ve been when you stick them in your ear….

Shout out to the incredible NHS for helping me and dealing with my utter incompetence at being a sane human being! These kind and selfless folks have my highest respect and gratitude.

TLDR: I was sleeping/dreaming and ate my right AirPod Pro earbud thinking it was a vitamin. Hospital chaos ensued, it came out the other end kind of working. Never sleep with your AirPods in, folks!!