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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Cool_Advertising126 on 2023-06-25 15:57:49+00:00.

My biological mom died when I (20f) was a newborn. I also have an older sister Mia (22f). Our biological mom’s best friend was Lisa and because mom could not carry children, Lisa offered to carry us for her and dad. After mom’s death, Lisa and my dad ended up getting together. And I know what many will think. But DNA did confirm we are our mom’s children (did a DNA test with our grandparents). They ended up moving out of the country and while it was tough on our grandparents they offered support and would send money and cards and gifts for them/us. Only Mia and I never got the cards and gifts. We heard about the money. We were told it was sent by a family friend.

We were led to believe Lisa was our real mom. Mia found out the truth last year when she went back home and went snooping. We reached out to our grandparents and started to form a relationship.

This was upsetting to dad and Lisa who said Lisa was our mom in every way that mattered. I told Lisa during that argument that she was a shitty friend and I wish she had been erased from her kids the way she erased her own best friend from us. She said it wasn’t fair and they had their reasons. I told dad he clearly never loved mom. He said that was unfair. I told them they erased the woman who was our biological mom and that made her a real mom too.

Our grandparents were not aware of everything and we weren’t going to say anything. They were so appreciative that we had a good life and that (as they thought) we grew up knowing about mom. In the end I could not let them keep sending money or anything else. They stopped when they learned the truth and sent a letter saying dad and Lisa (I call her Lisa because it does really disgust me what she did and dad too, but I have a best friend and I could not do what Lisa did). Dad and Lisa were distraught because one of their children together is sick and they were using that money to help themselves stay afloat.

They were enraged when they found out what I did and said I could have at least waited until my (half) sister was better. That I had punished her more than them and it was a sick thing to do.

AITA?