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The original was posted on /r/autism by /u/Queen_Secrecy on 2024-04-09 16:39:53.

I see so many men here complaining that dating as an autistic man is harder, thinking it is easier as a woman for some reason, even though it’s really not.

I’m a conventionally attractive cis-woman in her mid-20s, and was never in a relationship. I was never close to anyone in any way. Although I like the idea of a relationship in theory, I know I struggle too much to enter a healthy relationship.

I am autistic. I’m perceived as weird. I get nervous when people approach me, I get angry when someone touches me, I feel uncomfortable in group settings, I have delayed audible processing etc. etc.

Sure, people might not notice all that immediately, but they definitely will, once I have an actual conversation with them, which is usually necessary when someone wants to enter a relationship.

In my life, I only ended up getting along with one other autistic person on a date, but he passed away before any relationship came to be.

In the end, I am fully aware that those are ‘my problems’, which are not somehow the other genders fault. I’m so sick and tired of those autistic men who twist every narrative to avoid any accountability whenever possible.

(And before someone goes ‘not all autistic men’- yes. Yes I know! My father is autistic, and he’s a good dad. My brother is autistic too, and didn’t spiral down this lncel route either)