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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/feacockpeather on 2023-07-28 11:24:43.

Hi guys this is my first post im hoping for some advice and guidance

I [Female 32] am due to get married in September to the love of my life [Male 35] , we have been together 11 years.

For privacy reasons i wont tell you my current surname but it is the same as a flower, a beautiful name that i have always been proud of. Not only is it my name but its my fathers, my grandfathers, my great grandfathers and so on… my name is special to me and i like my name.

My first name is Louise. Pretty much everyone calls me Weez.

My husband to be’s surname is … Ruiz.

He is Spanish and also very proud of his family name. He feels strongly that i should take his name to make us a “proper” family and i do understand this and if it were a different name i may consider but the fact that my name would be Louise Ruiz just doesnt sit right with me.

I am the whitest white girl you’ll ever meet so having a surname Ruiz just wouldnt suit me, im not Spanish!

My friends are already picking on me calling me “Weez Ruiz” and i absolutely hate it. I like the name dont get me wrong, just not for me!

IF and this is a big IF - IFFFF we have children then ofcourse i will honour my husband and his bloodline and give our children his name… perhaps double barreled with mine since mine is such a lovely surname and i think would go well with Ruiz.

But my fiancé feels that this would make the names too long, he doesnt want me to double barrel my name either, he wants me to be a Ruiz.

WIBTA if i stuck my ground and refused to change my name? Any advice welcome!