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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 on 2024-07-02 04:00:02+00:00.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Jealous-Doubt2401

Thousands of Dollars wasted hosting a “friend”

Originally posted to r/EntitledPeople

TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of drug use/drug abuse. Entitlement. Descriptions of gross behavior, financial exploitation

Original Post June 17, 2024

Originally posted on an alt but it got deleted because of lack of comment history. I wanted to hide comment history since it highlights country in question but idgaf anymore. NSFW just in case. Mentions drugs and sex.

My friend from high school has been down in the dumps for a while. It’s her third year of college and while her parents pay for all her school needs and a little more, her reluctance to get a part time job leaves her strapped for cash all the time. This culminated to her spending all three of her summer breaks in relative nothingness.

She’s taking a gap year to stall out her senior year and I offered to host her at my parent’s house in my home country. She was ecstatic. I told her to bring enough money to be comfortable but to not worry too much about food costs as my parents can foot the bill (my parents offered to do so). For some reason she thought that this meant we would be paying her ticket. Mind you, a ticket would’ve costed minimum $1100.

Chaos ensued just two weeks out from the designated time of her arrival but she managed to cough out a ticket, courtesy of her parents. We’re on the third week of her stay and it’s been hell. I never knew anyone could change so much in 5 college semesters. Because we were long distance friendship, I never saw her behavior in the flesh. Let me just highlight some of the utter audacity of this bitch:

• She’s been avoiding doing the laundry, stuffing all her dirty clothes underneath the bed. At first it was because she was too lazy to put her clothes in the hamper (my mom graciously do all our laundry, mostly because she’s into fitness and a busybody), then when it ended up piling up she got too embarrassed to admit it. I ended up doing the laundry for her. Her room is a mess from her nightly food binging and somehow she snuck alcohol bottles into the house. I’m well into my fourth gnat trap in her room because she can’t keep her shit clean enough to avoid an infestation.
• She FaceTimes her cousin or best friend or whatever in the middle of the night. Then when she inevitably misses on our agreed schedule the next morning because she’s too tired, she lies and tells me it’s because the mattress is too uncomfortable. I can literally hear you laughing in the other room.
• We went to a bar. She meets a local there and asks me to hang around the city while she dates him because “she didn’t want to be left alone.” I told her to eat ass because I never agreed to being ditched like this, but decided to stick around anyways because I still had things I wanted to do in the city. Come night time and I went to pick her up only to see that she changed her mind and went home with the guy she just met. Womp womp.

Later she tells me she lied to him, saying she moved here. He didn’t want a one night stand with a tourist, but an actual relationship. She just wanted free drinks and sex. She then mentions that she was getting frustrated because guys weren’t approaching her when she was a foreigner??? She’s literally the same race as the locals, except with a darker complexion. Think French vs Portuguese in comparison.

• She’s doing drugs. Like, the illegal ones. I don’t even know how she got her hands on those, probably from the guy she just met. She brought them home and tried to smoke out the window. The drugs are gone from the house at least, I used cleaning the room as an excuse to flush it out(not literally).
• Parents bought us event tickets that were approximately $70 each. She decided to go to a club instead and wouldn’t answer her phone when I was left blindsided. She agreed to go, but didn’t tell me she changed her mind. I lied to my parents because I didn’t have the heart to tell my mom only I went.
• She never tells us when she’s hangover or whatever. Only after my parents buy the food she decides she’s too wasted to eat.
• Parents asked her to be a bit more thorough with her scheduling because she kept cancelling plans and sleeping in. Her response was to call my parents nosy and told them to get off her back. Luckily they don’t speak her language and they didn’t bother asking me what she said. They know she’s being a bitch.

This isn’t even all the things she’s done so far. My parents have spent close to $3500 on her, ranging from food and luxury trips around the country. They were going to take us to get a full course meal ranging around $150 and a trip to another country, but cancelled everything because of her behavior. Now she’s asking me about these things that were supposedly “promised” to her and I just told her straight that she’s acting like a festering cockroach.

I think she knows our friendship is over. She came out of the room yesterday after a day long sabbath, pretending to have starved out of stress. She has snacks stashed in her room and when I peeked in to see wrappers on the floor, she slammed the door in my face so I couldn’t see the mess. She claims that she’s just depressed and didn’t realize my family had all these “eastern” rules that was too foreign for her comprehension. rules like no shoes in the house and well…. Not turning the room into a pigsty. We both literally grew up in the same western country so these rules being too eastern for us is new to me. This isn’t even considering her family is also from an eastern country.

She sat me down to tell me we need to communicate better on what I expect from her since we’re adults now but I don’t see why I need to “communicate” that she shouldn’t be putting half eaten ramen in the closet for two weeks??? Anyways, I told her she can do what wants to do for the last week, and I’ll stay out of her hair. She again asked me if we were going on that foreign country trip we initially planned for. I told her no, and she’s sulking in her room again. Oh noes.

Anyways, I have one more week with this…. parasite. Reddit please give me strength.

RELEVANT COMMENTS

TheRealRedParadox

Yeah burn that bridge and never speak to her again OP, I’m sorry her true colors came out that way

OOP

Thank you, she sounded so put together aside from her obvious financial issues when we were long distance… I thought she was genuinely just a bit depressed 😭 Known her since elementary school but this friendship is no longer salvageable.

OOP on why they put up with the friends behavior

Luckily and unfortunately we were long distance for the duration of college. So luckily I didn’t deal with any of her new behavioral issues because she never showed me any. I knew she did develop a liking for smoking but it wasn’t as if I never smoke a blunt.

Unfortunately for me all her issues came to light around the second week of the vacation. That was when I had to start intervening on her mess and she started to slip back into her partying habits. By the third week it went fully blown up and now my parents know. Parents aren’t letting me kick her out but they sure am letting her know she’s only welcome to stay for another week assuming she’ll stay relatively clean.

Update June 25, 2024

I wasn’t going to update or anything but I thought what happened two days ago warranted another post. NSFW just because the original post had it.

Summary of OG post: My family decided to host my friend in a foreign country, and proceeded to spend thousands of dollars on her. It all goes down the drain, culminating in canceling a trip abroad planned for her due to her drug and generally terrible guest habits.

This isn’t some coming of Christ or scorned lover (friend?) revenge update but I felt the need to vent. About 4 days ago I went on a camping trip with the family. My “friend” decided to sleep over at the her new not-so-one night stand’s house until she left the country, most likely because she no longer felt welcome in my house. I told her we won’t be home but I get a text message from her while camping saying she’s going back home and needed the passcode to the house. There was no way in hell I was going to let her in the house alone so I ignored her text. She blew up my phone shortly after, including calls that I can’t even pick up anyways because it’ll bill me international calls.

Judging from her sporadic text and calls, I can only surmise she got kicked out of her guy’s house. Unfortunately I only got her side of the story but I suspect she either got too hung up on his drugs and ignored him, or grossed him out with her living habits. Did I mention this girl left vomit trails in the bathtub? Why doesn’t she puke on the toilet?! It was either that or she revealed she doesn’t actually live here since she did trick him into thinking this isn’t going to be a summer fling.

I texted her back while coming back 2 days ago telling her I didn’t have reception, and she replies with a real short “ok.” We let her in some time in the evening because my parents are still w…

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