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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/CarAccidentTA3456 on 2023-07-30 12:56:26.

For context: My fiancee’s brother (BIL) and SIL have recently started the divorce process after he caught her cheating. They are co-living with their son in their home as neither of them can afford to move out. In addition, my BIL has recently been made redundant, so he currently doesn’t have any income. SIL is choosing to be petty (which is completely out of her character), such as refusing to talk to BIL unless it’s about their son, expecting BIL to take care of himself financially, and talking behind BIL’s back to make BIL seem like the bad guy in the marriage.

My fiancee (27M) and I (25F) went to his brother’s house for a regular family gathering. At every gathering, the adults sit and chat together while the kids play together. BIL & SIL’s son (call him ‘Aiden’) was kicking a ball around the house. Despite being told multiple times by both BIL and SIL to not kick the ball inside the house, he continued to do so.

At some point, I got up and while I was walking from the table to the bathroom, Aiden ended up kicking the ball and knocked my glasses off my face. As a result, my glasses fell to the ground and broke. Both BIL and SIL felt bad, apologised, and offered to pay for the glasses repairs whilst also making Aiden apologise to me for breaking my glasses.

The next day, I went to the optometrist, who told me that it wasn’t possible to repair the glasses, and they had to be replaced. The replacement glasses ended up costing $200, which I had to pay out of pocket (since I don’t have insurance). I sent the invoice bill to my BIL (since I do not have SIL’s phone number) and he paid the money.

When my fiancee found out that BIL sent me the money, my fiancee got upset at me for ‘making BIL’s situation worse’ and having no empathy for him since he is going through a divorce and is unemployed. I argued back saying that I am also unemployed since I have finished my studies and I am in the process of finding work, and I do not have a lot of savings and I’m not sure how long it will last until I get a job (especially in this economy) so I cannot bite the bullet and pay for the glasses that got broken by Aiden. Fiancee asked me to refund the money back to BIL and that he will happily foot the $200 bill for him.

I may be the asshole here because I did not take into account of BIL and SIL’s situation when asking them to pay for my replacement glasses. Before the discussion with my fiancee, I believed that it was only fair that BIL and SIL reimburse me for my glasses since their son broke it (even if it was accidental).

I’m struggling with this dilemma and hoping to get some unbiased perspectives here on who should I let foot the bill, and I would also appreciate some advice on what I should do here.