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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/EmptyPossession4068 on 2023-06-27 19:23:43+00:00.

This screams helicopter dad or even AH but here I am regardless. And please, if you have any idea of what it sounds like my son might have, please please please let me know in the comments. His doctor won’t evaluate him without going through the school and school is over.

My wife and I have my niece (10) every day from 6am to 4pm while her mother sleeps from working the overnight. We have 2 kids (12f and 6m). Now, as you’ve gathered, my son has issues. He is so quick to anger. Like he has absolutely no emotional regulation whatsoever. He’s off the walls entirely. He’s always running, jumping, climbing on things, hiding under things, making animal noises (like dinosaur noises), etc. Even if he’s on his tablet. He will be super involved with his tablet (the only thing that keeps him calm) but he will make squawking or screeching sounds randomly. Like stimming! I guess. But like, even if he is having a fantastic day, all it takes is one super minor trigger and all bets are off. My wife is a fantastic mom. She can usually calm him no problem. But my niece is absolutely a trigger. She purposely makes him feel like he isn’t included or she doesn’t want him around, but she will make sure to manipulate my daughter in to not including her brother too. It’s been causing one too many freak outs.

Yesterday I absolutely had enough because I have openly told my niece to cut the shit on more than one occasion and she won’t. She will wait until I walk away to start shit talking me to my daughter and then will get an attitude and start bossing my daughter around and still not include my son at all. My daughter is sweet as a peach without this girl around and there’s no issues usually. But yesterday my niece wouldn’t stop so I told her to stay away from my kids. Told her to go play by herself. I told my sister what happened when she picked her kid up and she was pissed at me because “it’s not my kids fault that she can’t tolerate your son and his behaviors. You’re putting too much on her.” I told her that it’s one thing to not have tolerance and a completely separate issue when it comes to being a bullying asshole. She said I can no longer watch her kid (good) but now my family is ganging up on me.

ETA: my daughter doesn’t like my niece, nor does she want to hang out with her (she’s asked me several times to not have my niece here) but even if she did, that has nothing to do with my post. Please stick to the question. Maybe I should have clarified more: my son does not even need to be near my niece. She has gone out of her way several times to go to him while he’s on his tablet on the couch to poke at him and cause tension. My son DOES have issues but he’s not always the one causing them.