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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/baebaevandi on 2023-08-01 18:05:07.

My boyfriend and I just had a baby a couple of months ago. Since then things have been rocky and I am feeling very hurt and I think he may be feeling the same way. We have been working hard to try and make this work, but keep arguing about things money, sleep and not feeling recognized for our contributions. When I was about 4 months pregnant, I sat my boyfriend down to have a discussion about my maternity leave. I wanted for us to both be on the same page about how long I would be taking and that I would not be paid while on maternity leave. We agreed that I would take 12 weeks of maternity leave and that was our plan. A few weeks before our baby came, my boyfriend and I spoke about the upcoming events and I told him that I was going to need help paying rent. He became upset, I apologized for the miscommunication and then he helped me pay rent for the 12 weeks that I was on maternity leave. So he made 3 rent payments. Now, awhile later, our hospital bills have arrived and he informed me last minute that he will not be splitting them with me because he helped me with rent. Even though every discussion we’ve had leading up to this, even after my leave already started, we agreed that we would split them. My boyfriend makes six figures and three times my annual salary… Well he did, but he quit his tech job to spend more time with us on maternity leave. But that actually turned into him starting his own business which is another reason that he is complaining to me that he can’t afford to pay the hospital bills that we have both been aware of for some time now. Am I the asshole for being upset that he is bailing on me last minute for splitting the hospital bills? I want to support him with his career and dreams, but this feels unfair. Am I the asshole for thinking that this is unfair of him after he helped me with my rent while I was on maternity leave?