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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Throwaway2984dc on 2023-08-03 18:50:26.

My boyfriend(30) has a son(6), when we started our relationship he was 2. His mother didn’t want me to be involved in the care of their child, and she and I have never really seen eye-to-eye. In the beginning, it went really well and his son was here every other week, but the older he got the less time he was with his mom and he’s with us 100% now since his mom was arrested a year ago.In the beginning, we divided the chores and child care equally. 4 months ago my boyfriend got an opportunity to work on 3 projects, which could lead him to a big promotion.

He’s always working late, either from home or in the office. I’ve been doing all the chores and childcare since then. I cook, clean, get his son ready in the morning, and drop him off at daycare. The only thing my boyfriend has to do is get his son ready for bed.I told him last Friday that from Monday on I won’t be doing the childcare anymore. He got angry, he said that we’re a family and we need to support each other. He told me he needed me right now and that I just need to be patient.I replied saying that this is his son and he needed to do the majority of the childcare.

I’ve been doing all of it and it’s not fair since he is his father.He then went into the other room, got his son, and told his son that “Mommy says she doesn’t want to take care of you anymore” while pointing at me. I said to not call me that because I’m not his mother and his son started crying. I of course comforted and apologized to his son, because it wasn’t my intention to upset him.My boyfriend is still mad and has been taking care of his son, but won’t speak to me.

I didn’t think this was unreasonable, he is the parent and needs to do more of the child care. And also the mom doesn’t even want me to be involved in child care, so I’m already overstepping her wishes. My sister is on his side and says I’m at fault since he and I are a family now, and he needs my support right now. And that the mother’s wishes don’t matter at all right now. Like I don’t think this was at all unreasonable, but I’m not sure if I was unreasonable here, AITA?