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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Kwajboi on 2023-08-04 03:37:14.

My (M28) older brother Gary (m44), his wife Leslie (F43), and two kids(m14, f12) are coming to my state to watch their oldest son graduate boot camp. He e-mailed me and said they’d be dropping by on a certain date at a certain time. I assumed they just wanted to have lunch or something.

Then I get a e-mail with their special ‘dietary requirements’ that their kids have and what they like for breakfast, snacks, etc… I finally called him and asked what’s going on and he said, ‘why stay in a hotel for a week when we can stay with you in your big house with a pool and a grill’. I said, ‘well, mainly because I never asked to have 4 people staying with me’.

I don’t mind my brother so much except he and his wife smokes ALL the time and his wife swears, a LOT. I told them I don’t allow smoking anywhere on my property, even outside because of the cigarette butts which ticked him off, told him I’d give him a list of hotels in town if that’s what he wanted, or my girls and I could meet them for lunch somewhere.

Nope, he wanted a free pass vacation and called ME the AH and told my family who are all mad. When they started calling me and leaving nasty messages I basically ignored them (I screen most of my calls). I don’t like pushy family members and this was pushy. But am I wrong to not allow them to stay when they won’t go by my rules? They’d be a bad role model for my girls to be around which they definitely don’t need but who knows? I’m pretty sure what the answer is but still, AITA?