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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/LucyAriaRose on 2024-09-27 04:03:40+00:00.


I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/PondasArm. They posted in r/AITAH

Paragraphs added for readability. Short and to the point post. Thanks to u/BakingGiraffeBakes for the rec.

Do NOT comment on Original Posts. Latest update is 7 days old.

Mood Spoiler: OOP makes the right choice

Original Post: September 19, 2024

After returning from a month long trip to Florida with her friends she decided to tell me how unhappy she was and wanted to talk about divorce. Also mentioned to one of our kids that she was going to retire early and return to Florida and live on the beach. I cannot retire for another 13 years and she knows this.

She has always been secretive with her phone. Sleeps with it under her pillow and carries it with her everywhere in the house. Started to take 3 hours walks where she would shower, change clothes, and put on perfume before going. Had regular discussions with me about how we should divide everything in the divorce. During this discussions I would also get a reminder of how unhappy she is.

As negotiations continued it was decided that I would keep the house so she could keep all of her retirement for her future beach life. She also made two return trips to Florida in a month span. Supposedly by herself but she was very cryptic about them. The last one she did not tell the kids about them and did not communicate to them for the whole 5 days.

Final red flag is when she accidentally sent a text to our daughter with a sexually explicit message that I assume was meant for her boyfriend or affair partner. Now that it is time for her to move out she doesn’t want to get a divorce. AITAH for wanting to follow through with it?

Top Comment:

Harvard_Diplomat: She didn’t change her mind. Sounds like her new BF in FL didn’t work out.

There is no consensus bot on AITAH, but a majority were NTA

Update Post: September 20, 2024 (Next Day)

Update: I am a real person. Yes, I did confront her about all of this but she still denies it. Claims message was meant for me.

However, I never received it other than the screenshot from when I was informed about it. Asked her why she doesn’t just go live with this person unless he is married too. Also told her that I am not a placeholder until she can move in with this guy or find a new one if he bailed. Already spoke to a lawyer earlier this week when she was all in on the divorce.

I feel there is no going back after this and want to see the divorce through to the end. She started the cold feet routine soon after meeting with the attorney. Yes, I know asking the question here makes me seem like an idiot. All of her actions did make me angry and I wasn’t ignoring them. Thank you everyone for your thoughts on the matter.