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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Justpoliyseter6 on 2023-08-06 04:05:16.

Hi, I(22F) met my boyfriend(24M) about 2 years ago. We have a great relationship and get along really well and I could really see myself spending the rest of my life with him. There is only one problem… his mom (I will call her Mary throughout this story).

After almost a year of our relationship I really wanted to meet mary and my boyfriends dad but he kept pushing it off. Eventually he decided to set some things up so we could all go out to eat. When I first met his dad he was nice but I kinda got the feeling Mary didn’t like me.

Eventually as I started to get to know them more Mary started making really rude comments to me about what I was eating. She would say things like “are you really going to eat all of that?” or “don’t you think you should watch your figure a little bit, my son doesn’t like fat girls” etc. I would laugh it off as a joke but my boyfriend and his dad never said anything. This happened every time we would eat with them and I started to lose my patients. This went on for months.

Everything came to a boiling point at tonight’s dinner we had. She started with her usual comments but something about this one comment made me lose it. “I didn’t cook a lot of food today so please try to restrain yourself. I know it’s hard for your kind”. She made me feel like some kind of child and I lost it. I slammed my fork on the table and stood up and yelled “Maybe you should consider restraining yourself. Last time I checked this is the second plate you’ve gotten fat bitch?” Mary and my boyfriends dad was shocked. Mary started crying and I immediately felt bad. Before I could even say anything my boyfriend grabbed my hand and took me to the car and we went home. It was silent on the way home and I asked if he wanted to talk and he said “let’s just talk about it tomorrow” he then went to bed but I can’t help but feel bad.

I need to know if I was out of line. So Reddit am I the asshole for calling my boyfriends mom fat while at dinner?

Edit: A few people have been asking what she meant by “your kind”. I don’t want to jump to any conclusions because I don’t know for sure what she meant but I assumed it’s because I’m black and the percentage of obesity is high In the black community.