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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Ordinary_Ad_72 on 2023-08-07 15:05:11.

My husband of 12 years always claims that he never can lie to me, and we have had our share of great fights, but we are good. A couple of weeks ago he did not go to work and stated he has to visit the bank and left. which I believed and he came back within few hours and everything was ok.

And this Thursday night I couldn’t sleep as I had bad throat so I stayed up and he spent the time with me talking to me and he mentioned that he would not go to work the next morning as he needs to visit a clients office. Which didn’t make sense to me as he has his team to manage that and at his role he doesn’t need to do client visit. I asked him few follow-up questions and it all was very vague. The next day he gave me his phone so that I can pick the pictures I want from the earlier trip and airdrop them and a message from his guy friend pops up letting him know that he has picked the place they would go.

Background on this friend they went to school together and we live very close by to their place. they usually take eve walks together or go out for drinks. I do not get along that well with his wife, so I avoid any family get together. So, I did not understand why he had to lie to me. So, I waited for him to get ready and leave and asked him again and he swore he is going to meet a client. And later when I called and told him I saw the message he blamed it all on me stating he has to do it as I am not comfortable around them or meeting his family.

Earlier he has not told me about visiting their house for dinner and stuff and has argued that it was not a lie, and he was just not mentioning of it to not hurt my feelings. I understand that meeting a guy best friend isn’t a big deal, but this makes me wonder if this is the only thing he is lying or not talking about. So AITA? and how do deal with this?