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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/birthdaybook on 2023-08-11 11:41:21.

I (F just turned 25) have a friend, “Logan” (M25), and we’ve been friends since we were 7/8. I have a boyfriend “Matt” who I’ve been dating for 7 months.

My birthday was last week, and I had a dinner party for some friends before we all went out to a club. There was 8 of including Logan and Matt. We had a little bit of a “gift opening” before dessert, and Logan gifted me an old copy of The Great Gatsby.

The book has a special significance to us, because for many years Logan and I lived in different countries. We kept in contact, but we didn’t see each other in person for about 4 years. We finally got our parents to agree for me to fly to his country to visit in 2013. We were talking about what we were going to do on the visit and I really wanted to go and see The Great Gatsby movie, which had just come out, as it is my favourite book. Logan had never even heard of it, and I said he had to read it before we went to see the movie. Logan was never academic, and to this day it is the only fiction book he’s ever read all the way through (not counting children’s books). Whenever I ask him to do me a favour he always replies with “I read The Great Gatsby for you, so I may as well” and it’s a running joke.

We always go big on birthdays but this book means so much to me.

The day after, Matt said he felt the book was an inappropriate gift, because of how expensive it is. I tried to explain to him that it’s just a sentimental gift and that the cost isn’t the point, but Matt said he feels weird that another man gifted me something that costs more than his car. This argument went on for a long time and Matt said that he thinks I should return the book, and if it means so much to both of us then Logan can keep it. I told him to grow up.

We’ve been having this fight on and off for a week. Matt’s saying that it’s reasonable for him to be uncomfortable but I think he’s being a jealous child. It’s not like Logan gave me a giant diamond necklace just to show off, he gave me something heartfelt that means the world to me, and I think that should be more important than the fact that Matt thinks it’s outside what he deems an acceptable budget.

My mother is saying to give Matt the benefit of the doubt and maybe ask Logan to keep the book for now and if one day Matt is more secure I can take it back. My dad is saying Matt’s an idiot. My girlfriends are split.

This argument is just dragging on and I’m leaving for my birthday trip tomorrow and I just need some perspective on whether I’m being unreasonable wanting to keep the book?