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The original was posted on /r/aitah by /u/PartyRoyal8629 on 2023-08-11 08:27:19.

Throw away account since my fiancé knows about my main account.

I (22m) am in a fully funded PhD program at a great university. I currently still live with my parents and I started paying my parents some rent last Christmas. None of my older brothers ever payed rent and I overheard my parents stressing about money which ultimately lead to me willingly paying them $1,000 a month for rent (my Christmas gift to them was a note saying I would be paying them rent). My fiancé (22f) and I have been looking into moving out (rent not mortgage) and have been saving as much as we can. My fiancé and I had a conversation with my mother about decreasing the rent and my mother was willing to decrease it to $300 a month. I was beyond happy for a 70% discount but before I could thank my mom, my fiancé started talking back to my mom saying “none of his brothers ever paid rent so why are you making him pay rent, he is not going to pay rent anymore” and then an argument between the two of them ensued. I tried to calm the two of them down but my fiancé said to my mom “you shouldn’t have even bought a house if you couldn’t afford the mortgage” and then my mom told her to get out. Afterwards I talked to my fiancé privately and she stated “if you pay your mom that $300 rent then you are choosing her over me and I can’t be in a relationship where the guy chooses his mom over me.” I tell her we can still save a significant amount of money while paying $300 rent and she says “it’s the simple fact that your choosing your mom over me still.”

More side detail if needed:

  • My fiancé does not work as she is still in undergrad
  • I live with my parents and my fiancé lives with her parents
  • We have no debt as both of our cars have been paired off and no credit card bills.
  • Any other information you think will help please comment and I’ll reply back

TLDR; Fiancé doesn’t like that my parents charge me rent. I tell her that they are essentially my landlord so whatever they say I have to pay is what I have to pay. She says I’m choosing my mom over her if I give my mom rent money. AITAH for paying my parents rent?