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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/InstanceFresh on 2023-08-11 15:16:26.

My husband and I don’t get in many disagreements, but when we do it’s about money.

We keep our finances separate. He has his bank account and I have mine. We split house costs mostly 50/50. He makes about 10k more than I do so he does pay a bit more.

But he is so tight with money.

I have a tattoo I’ve been wanting to get for a long time. But I’ve either been pregnant or not financially able to spend frivolously.

It will be 400 per sitting for two sittings. I will have to take work off (paid) and arrange for care for my baby.

I’m paying for this myself. I work full time from home while also watching our 9 month old.

Yes it’s a frivolous expense but am I in the wrong for wanting to get something for myself to make myself feel good? I am not the type to go get my hair or nails done. The only frivolous thing I really spend money on is clothing recently because my body has changed since having a baby and nothing fits.

When I asked for his opinion last night he finally came out with saying that he’s not on board because there are other things we need to be spending our money on.

He is concerned because our bathroom needs remodeling and he wants new countertops and he thinks those items keep getting pushed back for other things. We afford all of the basics just fine. We are not well off but we are also not struggling to keep food on the table by any means.

Am I wrong to think that there will ALWAYS be a better reason to spend money and it will never be an ideal time to put money into something cosmetic like a tattoo.

So he will never be on board anyway.

Am I selfish? We lost our first baby halfway through the pregnancy and I got pregnant again months after. I feel like I’ve been pregnant for two years and have put everything on hold. I feel like I don’t even recognize my own body anymore. This tattoo means a lot to me.

So AITA?