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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/FunEcho4739 on 2023-08-11 23:56:56.


So I am supposed to be getting married in a few months. I assumed my fiancé and I would share finances. Currently he earns more than I do. Long term, after finishing grad school in 4 years, I will earn about 5x what he does.

Today, my fiance informed me that he isn’t sharing money with me and I just need to “get a job” if I want money. So I am looking at struggling to balance work with grad school, basically working 60-80 hours a week when you count grad school time as “work”, which is what I have been doing for the past 3 years of our relationship, to get through school.

So as his “wife”, I will be working 60-80 hours a week, to his 40 hours a week- all so that for the rest of my marriage to him, he gets a claim to half the return on investment of me slaving away like this???

I guess I am realizing that long-term, marrying him doesn’t benefit me. If things don’t work out 10-20 + years down the line, I am stuck paying him alimony, sharing half any assets I accrue with him, possibly even partial ownership of my practice. When he can’t help me at all in the short term. What’s the point of marrying someone like this?