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The original was posted on /r/aitah by /u/Ill_Atmosphere1064 on 2023-08-12 18:26:59.

So this probably isn’t the update people were hoping for.

I told Grant all of Keith’s awful behaviors and he interrupted me with the same tired excuses. I asked him if it wasn’t Keith but some random person, would he see it as innocent. He was silent.

I made an ultimatum that we had to go to couples counseling for the marriage to go forward. He agreed.

Grant then brought up the wedding. There was a few reasons I didn’t want Keith to be best man. One of them was the best man speech. I didn’t want to be insulted even subtly on my wedding day. Grant said that if I didn’t want Keith to be best man, then no one would be. I said that’s fine. Honestly I wanted to talk this over in couples counseling but he insisted on rehashing our arguments.

He also said that just to be fair I wouldn’t have a maid of honor. I didn’t understand this. Frankly, he didn’t have a problem with my friends. Grant likes them. It felt like he was doing that to punish me.

Then he said that if Keith wasn’t invited to the wedding, which isn’t what I said at all, then I shouldn’t either invite my maid of honor Alice, who’s my best friend, or Hannah. Hannah’s a bridesmaid but I don’t understand how he dragged her into this besides being Keith’s wife? It was a tit for tat situation. I think he was trying to make me back down by issuing ultimatums.

It backfired because Grant told Keith about our arguments on him and Hannah not being invited to the wedding. Which we hadn’t even agreed on. Keith laughed off him not getting invited but he got really pissed at Grant for uninviting Hannah. He screamed at Grant and basically won’t talk to him anymore.

Grant is upset because I’m mad at him and Keith is mad at him. I told him to save it it for couples counseling because opening his mouth did nothing but ruin the situation. This is way too much drama for a wedding. I don’t want this to be the rest of my life and our kids when we have them and I’m rethinking our marriage.