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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/SunComprehensive1271 on 2023-08-13 08:15:08.
Me and my husband have two kids, Jake (M22) and Tilly (F17).
Our son still lives with us. He is in a relationship with a girl named Alice (F22) and they’ve been together for just over 8 months.
Around a month ago, Jake asked us if she could move in. We agreed on the condition that she gets a job and doesn’t cause any problems.
For the first couple of weeks, it was all fine and cheerful.
After that it went downhill.
I work nights and during my break I noticed I had a missed call from Tilly. At this point it was like 1 in the morning. Jake also works nights and my husband was out of town.
I called her back and she was upset and I could hear loud music and other noises.
I asked her what happened and where she was. Tilly explained that Alice invited her friends over to the house and they’re all getting drunk and “acting crazy” and refusing to leave. I told Tilly to stay put and I’d come home.
I had to leave work and I immediately drove home. I could hear the music booming from the house 2 blocks away with how loud it was I went ballistic as soon as I got through the door and yelled at all of Alice’s friends to leave or I’d call the cops.
Alice was drunk and argumentative, as angry as I was there was no reasoning with her or having a proper conversation and she went to sleep.
The house was absolutely trashed. I called my husband so we could make sense of the situation.
When Jake got home, I told him what happened. I told Jake me and his dad agree that Alice can’t stay here anymore, and she needs to be out by the end of next week.
Jake protested and said we’re being unfair and that it’s just one mistake and she deserves another chance. He got really upset and stormed off.
Alice moved back in with her parents the next day. Now Jake is talking about moving in with them and is avoiding us. My husband is with me on this but seeing my relationship with my son so strained is making me wonder if we really are wrong.
Not at all, he’ll be pissed for a while, but he’ll get over it.