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The original was posted on /r/twoxchromosomes by /u/madambleu on 2023-08-21 21:06:16.

This is not an epiphany of some sort, but more like a rant/an indication of deep exhaustion with this pattern.

I’m reflecting on this past weekend, and just my general interactions with men throughout my life.

I know that this has been commonly said, but I still honestly do not think it’s talked about nearly as much as it should be. This weekend, I repeatedly told strangers (men), that I wasn’t interested. I noticed either a sense of disgust with me (as a sort of social revenge?) or fascination/motivation on their end after I expressed ‘no’ not just once but multiple times.

Of course, with most men, it turned to them giving me a lot of attitude and calling me pretentious when I tried to really set boundaries and/or them trying to play dumb and convince me that I am interested but I just don’t realize it. I know this is nothing new, and we’ve all been through it.

I’m 28 years old and really at my wits end because this has seeped into interactions and not just going out on the weekend, but of course in the professional world. I work in the human rights world, and I feel that men do not want to hire women that even SEEM sure of themselves or do not have that ‘executive assistant’ vibe while speaking to them even as peers. Mind you, I’ve been an executive assistant before…it’s more so to highlight the idea that woman may be able to formally move up on paper in their positions, but not socially. We’re considered socially inept and easy to sway. I’m exhausted beyond words with this trope.

I can truly give too many examples. I asked my ex (politely) to not contact me and he still tries to re-establish contact after I firmly and politely communicated that I do not want to establish contact. Men feel that if they lobby for themselves that women will just mull over our (supposedly) overly emotional bullshit and conform to their needs/wants.

I can go on and on…male doctors not believing in one’s pains (turned out to be a ovarian torsion), being followed by men and them being amused that you seem terrified/paranoid about them following you (and of course feeling like it’s my fault…but people don’t want to verbalize it as such), men not believing you have an imagination and autonomy that’s not built to feed their needs, and etc etc.

There’s so many other small (everyday) things that contribute to this feeling, but I just thought I’d leave this here.

Thank you for listening. I welcome hearing your thoughts and feelings on this matter. I’m also interested in reading more about this matter- I welcome any recommendations.