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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/SkyDry8364 on 2023-08-22 17:14:09.

I work in a male dominanted field, our boss always sends the same four guys to every business trip and meeting. When I confronted my boss about this, he told me they have the experience to seal the deals. I asked how was I meant to get said experience if I am never given the same opportunity. My boss simply laughed and said it takes time. I spoke with other female colleagues asking if they have ever been asked to go on business trips or meetings outside the office and each of them said no. When I found this out I immediately reported it to HR cause such behavior was limting our opportunities at work.

Now since said meeting with HR office dynamics have been weird not just for myself my colleagues. They are upset I went to HR, they claimed I rocked the boat needlessly, and if I should have thought how my going to HR would have impacted others beside myself. I was extremely upset and spoke with my BF about this and even he is not on my side. I explained my side, I told him I never outted then out directly. My BF told me he can understand why my colleagues were annoyed and upset with me. He explained by me complaining I not only put a mark on my back but my colleagues back as well. He understands why I did it, but also said I have to think of others also. He told me I would have been better off finding a new job or playing ball. Not forcing others into a position of defiance if they did not wish to be in one.

I feel defeated, was in the wrong to report this to HR? Should I have kept my mouth shut and played nice?