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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Green_Reference_8688 on 2023-08-22 19:49:51.

I (F20) have an older brother (M34) “Tim”. Tim has a wife, “Vicky” (F33).

For a while now, I’ve noticed Vicky has been acting weird around me. She avoids interacting with me, avoids eye contact, and doesn’t make conversation, and generally seems annoyed with my presence. I wasn’t really sure what her problem was.

It was starting to get to me so I gently as possible asked Tim about it. He confirmed Vicky was angry at me over something. He explained that a while ago, my mother posted some old photos from his and Vicky’s wedding on Facebook (I don’t have Facebook so I didn’t know) and that she used a filter or photo editor that made my dress look white, when it was actually pastel blue.

Later, Tim, Vicky and me were alone and Tim brought this issue up and said it needs to be talked about. Vicky started to become visibly upset and she pretty much repeated what Tim told me, and said that the edited photos were disrespectful, and that really I shouldn’t have worn a color that was so close to white anyway.

I reminded Vicky that I was 9 years old when they got married, and don’t even really remember much from it. She said I must’ve had some choice in what to wear. I told her I don’t know because I don’t remember, and that if it bothers her so much she should take it up with my mom, and I told her that this grudge she’s holding against me is stupid.

Vicky looked mortified and said that I didn’t have to be so calloused, and that I had no reason to be rude to her and dismiss her concerns. Tim is now also mad because I “disrespected” his wife.

I just didn’t understand what other response she could be expecting, especially when I have a complicated relationship with my parents. Was I wrong?