This is an automated archive made by the Lemmit Bot.

The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/Albert_Oha on 2025-03-07 21:29:05+00:00.

I’m a bartender in New Orleans. I’m behind the bar a couple hours ago, and this young guy comes in with two of his buddies in tow. I carded him- it’s his 22nd birthday. He says last night “they” were out, and they had Irish car bombs, and wanted to know if I could make him an Irish car bomb. I said “sure!”. Friends didn’t want any, they had hand grenades. I head to the tap, start pouring the Guinness in a smaller than a pint-sized clear plastic cup, as one does with such things.

(Im going to interrupt my own story for lesson time) Irish Car Bombs, for those that don’t know, are a drink that is made by dropping a “Bomb” shot which consists of half a shot of Baileys and Half a shot of Jameson (or varying amounts of those depending on your bartender) into a glass containing 6 ounces of Guinness Stout. 

The flavor is honestly wonderful. It’s a REALLY good drink. The caveat to this drink is as follows: If you do not drink it VERY fast- within a matter of single digit seconds fast- the Bailey’s will curdle. And it’s not drinkable once that happens. The reason you only do 6 ounces of Guinness is to facilitate being able to consume the whole drink in a single chug. 

So, back to my customer. 

My customer is marginally buzzed, but not anybody I can’t serve. He sees the smaller cup and like a young, cocky idiot he says “Hey! Why are you being cheap with the Guiness? Im paying for it, give me a full sized car bomb!” 

I said “This is the correct size. I can’t make it too much bigger because you won’t be able to finish it”. 

“I’m a full grown man. I think I know what I can handle. I asked for a full size car bomb”. He turns around and rolls his eyes at his buddies.

This dude thinks I’m challenging his ability to chug booze.

I say “man, I’m gonna warn against this, but I’ll make it if you want it”. 

Like a complete dickhead this  “Respectfully, right now, you’re my bartender and just need to take my order. I know my own limits. I can handle a regular-ass car bomb”. 

I said “Your the boss”. He nodded at me in approval of my FINALLY having caught on. 

He turns around and I can tell he’s talking a little shit to his buddies.

I filled a pint glass with Guinness. Probably one of the best heads I’ve ever put out that early into a shift. It was beautiful.

I handed him the beer, then the shot… 

and I proceeded to watch him bomb his stout…

Upsy-Daisy!

He made it a good 1/3rd of the way before he had to come up for air. It was that second gulp where I knew it happened. I could see the baileys curdled in the cup, sticking to the glass. 

I’m guessing the fact that he damn near had to start chewing the chunks is what made him realize something was wrong.

But dammit, this kid was a trooper. He finished a second big gulp… and the rest was just rotten… I started stocking napkins just to see where this went.

He was on chug three.

I realized I was covering my mouth with my hand at this point, and his buddies just didn’t understand the gravity of what they just witnessed.

He had to quit after the 3rd swig. There was still a bit left in the bottom, just floating curdled pieces of the baileys.

Sometimes in literature, we read about people turning green from disgust. This was the first time I had ever seen that. I’ll never forget it.

Plain as day I looked at him and I said “you were right. You handled it. Cash or card?” 

No words needed to be exchanged. I rang him out, and I said “thank you so much for that”, and he split. 

$0.00 tip. 

Worth every penny.