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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/IamManHearMeBelch on 2023-06-22 00:09:52+00:00.

I (35M) was told by my wife (33F) last night that she agreed to house sit and dog sit for her friend’s family for a week in the fall. Apparently, they were talking and mentioned how they wanted to do a nice family roadtrip cross border to the US and can’t take the dogs with them. My wife said she’d love to do it for them, then comes home and tries to convince me to do it with her. I’m really not up to it and declined. Then she got upset with me about why I didn’t want to do it and it’s “really important to her” which is why she kept insisting. I steadfastly declined and told her that it was because I really didn’t want to. She got upset that this wasn’t a “good enough reason” to which I responded that that was her opinion and she needs to respect mine. Anywho, we haven’t spoken to each other since last night besides the normal hello’s, etc.

From my perspective, I really don’t like being pigeonholed into doing something which is doubly annoying because of the reaction. I am also not okay with taking responsibility for someone else’s pets for a week and could never live with myself if something happened to them on my watch.

For context, my wife is very close with the friend’s family in question and calls them her second family.

Am I the asshole here?

Edit: Some clarification on the “not speaking” comment.

We are both prone to saying shit in anger that we regret later (has happened repeatedly) so we go away to cool down then revisit the conversation. This method works for us but definitely isn’t conventional by any stretch.