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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 on 2025-05-14 04:02:01+00:00.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Standard_Display6293

Am I overreacting for refusing to eat at a restaurant that messed up my order once?

Originally posted to r/TwoHotTakes

Thanks to u/queenlegolas & u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU

TRIGGER WARNING: Poisoning someone, gaslighting, fatshaming, ignoring allergies

MOOD SPOILER: enraging

Original Post May 6, 2025

Okay the title sounds ridiculous I know but hear me out. I am gluten free, not by choice but out of medical necessity. I became allergic about 5 years ago so it’s not new and I have gotten pretty good about eating out without being completely obnoxious, and I know my limits with ingesting gluten.

When I went out with friends last month I ordered a cheeseburger with no bun and subbed the side of fries with steamed veggies to avoid leftover gluten in the fryer. When the plate came it had fries and a bun. I asked the waitress if my plate could be remade because I was allergic to gluten.

She gave me attitude, told me potatoes don’t have gluten so I can eat fries, and to take the bun off because the kitchen was slammed. I told her I could wait and didn’t need to be prioritized, but to please just have my food remade. When it finally came, it came out in a takeout box with all the checks.

I wasn’t about to make a fuss and I was just planning on going home after so I figured I’d eat the takeout at home and say oh well. But on my check I was charged for two meals, with an upcharge for substitutions on both. I went to the bartender and got one meal taken off my bill and tipped her nicely in cash, but decided to never eat there again.

So last night I had family over and they wanted to order in, specifically from the same place that got my order wrong last month. I told them that’s fine but I would order from somewhere nearby and just go pick them both up. I thought this was reasonable, but my family looked at me like I just suggested a lion go vegan. They told me they thought I was out of my childish phase and that not eating gluten wouldn’t help me drop the extra weight I’d put on.

It was such a massive overreaction to me, and I don’t know why they felt the need to comment on my weight (which I wasn’t concerned about until they said that!). So I explained the situation that I had a bad experience there with a simple ask and they doubled down that it’s immature to never eat there again and to inconvenience everyone else just because I don’t want some carbs.

I dropped it because I was so shocked and just ordered from the restaurant next door. Turns out they have the same generic brown takeout boxes so when I got back and we ate everyone was telling me ‘see don’t you feel silly now, everything is fine’ and that I needed to stop being ‘a Karen’. It’s the next day and I just feel like it was so weird and I wanted to share what is kinda a funny and lighthearted story, but I’m also slightly wondering if I am overreacting by not going there again?

RELEVANT COMMENTS

BadCompany919

No you’re not overreacting lol you were perfectly reasonable in just ordering somewhere else and picking it all up. Does your family know it’s medically necessary for you to avoid gluten???

OOP

They do! That’s why I was so baffled. Apparently they didn’t think I was serious? Or I’d grow out of it the same way I developed it. Who knows.

~

deignguy1989

Why do you spend time with your family? They sound horrible.

OOP

To answer the question: because they’re family To address the statement: I’m starting to see that…

Update May 7, 2025

What i thought would be a pretty lighthearted am i overreacting question turned into quite a family saga and a trip to the er real damn fast so i wanted to update my ‘silly’ restaurant boycott story.

But before the saga heres a happy update: One of my friends knew i had a throwaway Reddit account and saw this post on it and called the health department herself and reported the restaurant, then left a long and seething review, and even went back and talked to the manager about our exact waitress. She was there and had already shit talked the restaurant with me, but knowing all this made her go nuclear. God I love her.

So the drama, I wrote this post the morning after the original dinner happened. The dinner was decent but I was very quiet and then reading all the supportive comments calling out my family’s behavior was really making me think. So when my sister called me later in the day to ask why I was so weird at dinner I had already been thinking about it and I kinda snapped, I said that I was quiet because I was so hurt by the things others said and nobody defended me, per usual, meanwhile my friend went out and fought for me even when she didn’t have to. So she and I fought about what was said, if I was being too sensitive, and even about if my allergy was as serious as I claim. I told her I didn’t need this and hung up.

My mom texted me later, so did my brother, and again my sister. All saying that we should drop it and we’re family and this is silly. I put them all in a group chat and said yes, it is silly to fight with me over my own medical diagnosis and the food that I eat that has nothing to do with them. I didn’t need my family to treat me like this when I have friends and other family that don’t and they can talk when they’re done being the immature ones.

I put my phone on do not disturb and finished my work day. Yes, this was all during a work day!! My night was relaxing, my husband cooked a delicious gluten free meal while I explained all this (he was out of town when it happened) and he was the perfect hype man and started highlighting more toxic behavior from my immediate family I have been blind to.

And then like a sitcom with ironic timing, there’s a knock on the door. My mom and sister came over to ‘make amends’ and brought dessert from a gluten free bakery. There are multiple around us, I didn’t question it. I’m sure you’re yelling at me to question it…I should have. We sat down to talk and I grabbed a cupcake, one bite in I knew by the texture it was not gluten free. I spit it out and just looked at them, waiting for them to admit it. My sister had a look of slight fear while my mom sat there looking smug. All she said was ‘gluten won’t kill you honey, you grabbed that cupcake pretty fast, that’s a bigger concern’. I was holding back tears from the feeling of betrayal and ran to my husband who was giving us space, he already had the keys and gave me my shoes to put on and we left to go to the er. He stopped at the door to say ‘you are never welcome in this house again’ and he took me to the er. I could feel my throat tightening as I was sobbing in the passenger seat.

I was seen right away at the hospital and I’m fine now, and writing this while waiting to be discharged as a way to process what the hell just happened. I feel like I opened my eyes and lost my entire family in under 24 hours. But the two hot takes family sure knew what was up, and my husband and my friends are plenty for me to feel loved and taken care of.

RELEVANT COMMENTS

Commenter

So you have this serious allergy but no EpiPen? And you got a ride to the ER instead of calling 911?

OOP

Have you ever paid for an ambulance ride? I hadn’t fully ingested the bite and we live less than 10 minutes to the hospital. There’s a good chance it would have taken the exact amount of time if not more and a lot more money for the paramedics to get me to the hospital than my husband.

And I used the epi-pen we keep in the car when I felt symptoms start. But you should always be monitored even after using the EpiPen because symptoms can come back in waves.

& added to another commenter

Thank you! Frankly I was going to try to make it to the hospital without using it to not have to replace it right now. The last time I bought one it cost me over $200. But I needed it. No I didn’t put it in the post, I ended up at the hospital and had another reaction anyway and thought more about that.

~

Beautiful_Falcon_617

Seriously, they purposely poisoned you. Press charges. They tried to hurt you because their ego is more valuable to them than your well being. And then the cherry on top, your mom tried to spin it into calling you fat. (You sure grabbed that cupcake pretty fast, isn’t that more of a concern?) There’s a handful of folks at my extended family gatherings that have varying degrees of gluten sensitivity/full blown celiac, and we always have something or multiple alternatives for the gluten free folks. And if I’m not sure, I list every single ingredient and let them make up their own mind if it’s safe or not. I can’t imagine doing this on purpose to someone you love. That is just vile.

OOP

We did decide to file a police report, even the nurses urged me to after my husband told them the whole story. Right n…

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