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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/NotSoChildfreeBride on 2023-08-29 22:36:06.

I (25F) got married to my husband a couple of weeks ago! We had invited 100 guests to our wedding, and since we both come from big families it was basically just immediate family and close friends.

In my immediate family there are only 7 kids under 18 and only 2 of them are toddlers, the rest are all teens. 3 of my husband’s siblings all have a few young kids each.

When we were planning the wedding I said I wanted to have the children in my family at the ceremony and the reception. Husband said he didn’t mind but he didn’t want to invite his nephews. He finds them too rowdy and active and he’s had bad experiences with them at other family events so he’d rather they weren’t at the wedding.

Basically that’s what we agreed to. So he told his family the children weren’t invited. I guess my in laws assumed no children would be there.

Well once they got to the ceremony they all started fussing about the fact that my family had children with them. I told my husband to sort it but I know his older brother and oldest sister still tried to sneak their kids into the reception before security stopped it.

They didn’t say anything during our honeymoon but now his siblings and his mother are saying we are TAs for excluding the children and apparently I am specifically TA because I’m “driving a wedge” between husband and his family.

Are we TA?