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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Individual_Land_22 on 2023-08-30 14:58:11.

I (M48) grew up in a low-income family. My parents worked very hard to provide for me and my siblings, and while we were always well-fed and clothed, we definitely felt our economic situation growing up. Because of this, I feel that I am financially wise and I try to live a bit frugally when possible (despite making a very good income).

For the past year, I have come under increasing pressure from my wife (F46) and our three kids (F19, M15, F13) to replace my old car. For reference, I drive a 2008 Hyundai Sonata with almost 200,000 miles. While cosmetically the car has a few scratches and dings, mechanically it is essentially in perfect condition and costs very little to operate.

My wife and kids, however, view the car as a source of family shame. They continually point out how it looks completely out of place in our area and that, considering my income, I should be driving something far nicer. I’ve always maintained with my children that they shouldn’t place too much emphasis on material things and that people should be investing in more important aspects of life, but I feel that these messages are partially ignored.

Last week, my eldest daughter borrowed the car to hang out with her friends and mentioned to me how they joked about how outdated her dad’s car is. I told her that she shouldn’t worry too much about what other people think and that we should be grateful that the car works. However, she told me that this was irrelevant in our particular context since all her friends arrived in much nicer cars and since we live in a nice area.

Last night, my wife and I planned on attending a social event with some of our friends and co-workers. As I was grabbing my keys, my wife stopped me and told me that we would be taking her car since mine had become too embarrassing.

During the drive, she told me I was being unreasonable for holding on to my car for so long and that I needed to get rid of it. She mentioned that I should consider that our youngest daughter just started high school and that she might feel uncomfortable getting dropped off and picked up in the car in front of her peers.

My wife then went on to say how people within our own social circle found it odd for me to drive such a car and brought up how my friends and co-workers have made jokes about the car in the past.

I told her that I wasn’t going to replace my car since it worked fine and getting a new one would be an unnecessary expense. I mentioned how it was an important lesson for our kids to learn, but she then accused me of being stubborn and stingy.

AITA?