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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/gutpunchd on 2023-08-30 13:34:39.

I (54f) was asked by my daughter if I could babysit my granddaughter overnight so she and her husband could go to a party. My granddaughter is 2 and I love spending time with her, but at the same time, it’s also a lot to be a single grandma and take care of a small child again! However, I am happy to have the time with my granddaughter so her mom and husband can go out and have some fun. They don’t do it often, so this isn’t a regular thing, but I also watch my granddaughter regularly throughout the week because they both work and I am retired. I was happy to have my granddaughter for an overnight and we had a great time—we cooked together and did projects and read books. I got her to bed and she didn’t sleep well, so it was a restless night. In the morning, I was looking forward to her parents getting her because I was pretty exhausted.

I didn’t hear from my daughter in the morning, but I figured they would be sleeping in after having fun the night before. No big deal. But still, I kind of wanted a phone call or text to let me know the plan for when my granddaughter would be picked up. Finally, at 3pm, I got a text that they were both extremely hungover, had been partying until the early morning hours, and her husband was too sick to drive and pick up the kid (my daughter doesn’t drive), so they were wondering if my granddaughter could just stay another night.

I hadn’t planned for that scenario and I was a little angry about it because I was worn out and hadn’t planned for another night. I said I would really like them to pick up my granddaughter but it was fine if they were hungover and couldn’t manage. I’d figure it out. I probably wasn’t as nice about it as I could have been because my daughter was like, no we’ll just come and get our kid because I don’t want to deal with you. I don’t even know what that meant. They showed up a couple hours later and my daughter was totally pissed off because I had “given her a hard time about keeping my granddaughter another night.” All I said was that I wasn’t prepared to have her an extra night and I wasn’t mad about it, but I was irritated that they hadn’t communicated with me and then made the ask.

Now my daughter is pissed off and I feel guilty as a grandma because I don’t want it to seem like I don’t want to spend time with my granddaughter. I love her! She is everything to me! However so is my daughter and now she is mad at me for not taking care of my granddaughter when they were out for one night for some fun and needed extra help for a second night.

AITAH?