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The original was posted on /r/maliciouscompliance by /u/AshleeAurora on 2025-06-06 16:30:57+00:00.

You ever work with someone who takes their job way too seriously? Yeah. I do. Her name is Angela. And last week, she nearly sent the entire office to jail.

It started when our manager told her, half-joking, “If it’s in the policy manual, just do it.” Angela took that as a sacred vow.

Next thing we know, she’s combing through the ancient compliance binder like it’s the Constitution. Finds a dusty rule that says we need a licensed export officer to ship international packages.

Mind you, we haven’t had one since four years ago

So what does Angela do? Does she ask someone? Nope. Does she use common sense? Not a chance. Instead, she reports the shipment to U.S. Customs ,because “technically, we’re in violation.”

The shipment? Batteries. To Dubai. Worth six figures. By noon, federal agents are at our office asking questions like we’re in an episode of Narcos.

Our boss looked like he aged ten years. I started mentally prepping for orange jumpsuits. Angela? Just sipping coffee like, “I was following protocol.”

So now I’ve got trust issues, chest pain, and a newfound fear of office manuals.