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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/idkythatsmypurse on 2023-08-31 13:26:26.

Edit: I am also a woman.

The other night, my wife went into the bathroom for a while. I asked her if she was ok and she said, “I’m trimming my split ends”. NBD, it isn’t out of the ordinary for her to do that. I went back to the living room and continued the end of my evening. About an hour later, I had dozed off a bit on the couch but I felt her sit next to me. She had done her hair a bit and it looked really nice. I complemented her hair and she started BAWLING.

I was so caught off guard, I scooted up and asked her what was wrong. She was upset because she is “going gray young”. Now she is 31, I’m 36. I listened to her for a few minutes. She compared herself to me not having many grays. I showed her that I do indeed have them. She asked me if I noticed how gray she is. Now, we don’t lie to one another so I said, “you have beautiful, thick hair and yes I have noticed, I love it!”.

She was inconsolable.

At one point as she was sobbing about looking like an old hag, I chuckled. That made her more upset. She said I was patronizing her, but I wasn’t. We have a very humor filled marriage and we can usually laugh at ourselves. All I could think looking at her was, “my god I love her so much… what a dumb thing to cry over.” And the hag part just made me laugh.

I offered her to go to the salon, buy a box dye kit. She was not having it. At about 1am, we had been in bed she was still crying. She finally got the ,“Hey, stop it. You can’t do anything about it, it’s life. Knock it off”.

AITA? Was I too mean?