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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/thatguysjumpercables on 2025-06-15 15:20:26+00:00.

Let my wife sleep in late because that’s what we do on Sundays. Went to wake her up the way I usually do by doing a standing hug thing while she regains consciousness. I stood up to let her roll over, then noticed her nightgown was starting to show heavy cleavage.

I am a boob man. Butts are nice of course, but boobs are my jam. And my wife appreciates my appreciation, so it’s not like I was doing anything abnormal or unwanted.

But the exact moment I went in to show my appreciation, she, eyes closed, decided to adjust her head on her pillow.

BAM

*Headbutted her right in her eyebrow.

It’s about 15 minutes later and there’s some noticeable swelling and I feel like a complete fucking asshole. Oddly she still thinks it’s her fault because she’s a dork but I know better. We laughed about it when the pain subsided, at least.

TL;DR: Tried to motorboat my wife, headbutted her instead.

Edit: clarification