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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/tabreakfast2 on 2023-09-01 02:57:13.

I have been married to my wife Laura (29F) for 2 years now, having dated her for 6 before that. It was a long road, her family can be difficult but I love my wife and accepted she came with her family. She has 1 sister Emma (27F) whom my post is about.

Emma asked to stay with us for a week while she saw some friends who live in our city and hotels were too expensive for her. I was hesitant but Laura thought it would be nice to see her sister for a week because they live hours apart now so we set up the guest room for her and agreed.

My wife is a very picky eater whereas I am not. I proposed a 50/50 split on cooking early in the relationship but my wife’s fussiness meant that it is now a 90/10 split where I cook the occasional lunch. I now know never to cook breakfast because my wife is very grouchy when she wakes up and wants to cook breakfast herself since I used to accidentally make it not to her liking. She’s more than happy with this arrangement and much prefers it to the 50/50 rule. I have asked multiple times if she wanted me to cook more but she said she likes having the space to cook and have time to herself so we stuck with 90/10.

Because I never cook us breakfast, I waited for my wife to wake up to cook Emma and myself breakfast - it would have been an hour wait. I thought Laura would want to eat with both of us so myself cooking breakfast just for her sister would have been pointless. Emma is an earlier riser like myself, so when she saw me waiting for my wife to cook breakfast, she was irritated and asked me why I put it all on Laura to cook. I explained the above about why I don’t make breakfast and she said that I should put more effort into making Laura breakfast and it would be a nice surprise for her to wake up to breakfast in bed. I explained that I have done in the past but she much prefers to cook herself and that it makes her happy. She called me lazy and trying to make excuses to force Laura to cook for me so I then told Emma to cook her own breakfast if she was that hungry and she left to buy breakfast I’m guessing.

My wife woke up and asked where her sister was so I explained. She sighed and said it wouldn’t have been hard to offer her toast or something low-effort and small until she woke up to cook. I told her that I didn’t really appreciate her sister intruding into our cooking dynamic like that, practically insulting me and implying I force her to cook for me while being a guest in our house.

I don’t think I am in the wrong here but I am open to all opinions. AITA?

EDIT typo